Super Saturday in the Hamptons: I Missed Kelly Ripa

I missed Kelly Ripa. After driving nearly three hours to a large field in Southampton with my best friend and a bag of trail mix to attend Super Saturday, I missed the most revered guest at the Hampton’s most charitable annual summer event.

Super Saturday is what it says it is: it’s a Super event on a day called Saturday where celebrities (like Kelly Ripa, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast member (and Paris Hilton’s aunt) Kyle Richards, and Tiffani Thiessen) and a bunch of very charitable folk descend upon a lawn and shop, eat, and mingle for several hours—and then tweet about it later.

The best part. Well, wait, there are two parts:

1. Top designer clothes are sold at heavily discounted prices, à la Loehmann’s. Sant Ambroeus caters.

2. All the money raised via luxury raffle, expensive entry tickets, and on-site spending benefits the Ovarian Cancer Research Fund. This year, Super Saturday raised $3.6 million. 

But anyway, back to the main point: I missed Kelly Ripa. Most likely because I was too busy eating my second plate of Sant Ambroeus bow-tie pasta and/or surveying the line for psychic readings with Betsy Wahmann and/or devouring a corn husk.

The downside was that a lot of the designer clothes, such as Free People, alice + olivia, Diane von Furstenberg, and Intermix, nearly sold out within the first hour, and by hour we mean “ the secret hour,” when the people with VIP tickets were able to get into the tent at noon—60 minutes before everyone else—and snatch up all the really good clothes, leaving the ordinary guests with the not-as-good-but-still-fashionable clothes.

But that’s okay, because what’s one woman’s trash is another woman’s treasure or whatever. Just when I thought I couldn’t find anything to buy amid the soggy, muggy weather in the middle of this field—I did. Hanging on a rack at the Junk Food booth was the perfect t-shirt: a bright blue Batman t-shirt.

And suddenly, all of my cares faded away. Like the fact that it was raining and we were going to drive back in it. Or that we were probably going to have stop at a gas station bathroom to pee on the way. Or that we ran out of trail mix. But most of all, I didn’t mind that I missed Kelly Ripa. And that made my Saturday a lot more super.

Links: ‘Playboy’ Seriously Chronicles Boobs, Al Gore Burns Larry David

Playboy‘s photo essay about the evolution of the breast is the very definition of Not Safe For Work, though it is also objectively intriguing. So maybe you could explain it to your boss that way? [Playboy] ● Tiffani Thiessen, better known as Kelly Kapowski, had a baby, but the real story here is that Thiessen is married to a man—a clean, normal, probably perfectly respectable one—that will go his entire life being compared to Zack Morris. It’s not fair. [People] ● Devo is streaming its new album for a bunch of cats, winning the internet. [Ustream]

● When Al Gore and wife of 40 years Tipper announced a separation, everyone wondered why. Maybe it was his affair with Larry David’s ex-wife Laurie, a producer of An Inconvenient Truth? Also known as: the best plot twist ever gifted to Curb Your Enthusiasm‘s next season. [Star] ● Zach Galifianakis may star in a remake of a film about a man who turns into a cartoon fish to fight Nazis. Were we presumptuous to assume our grandparents did not have stoner comedies? [LAT] ● There are at least 15 things Larry King does not know. [BuzzFeed]