‘All Star Celebrity Appretice’ Breaks Record For Most Odious People On One Show

Stretching the definitions of both "celebrity" and "star," the new trailer for All Star Celebrity Apprentice proves the Donald Trump-hosted show might be his most odious on television.

The "all star" cast includes professional has-beens like Stephen Baldwin and Gary Busey, professional creep Bret Michaels, and do-you-seriously-not-have-anything-better-to-do, sorta "celebs" like Penn Jillette, Lisa Rinna and LaToya Jackson. And of course Omarosa returns to reprise her role as the Original Angry Black Woman Stereotype Of Reality Television

The trailer is sefl-effacing, at least? So that’s nice?

But Trump still gives me the rage-skeevs by wondering aloud whether a woman on the cast is "a leader" or "a stressed out bitch."

Watch below: 

Contact the author of this post at Jessica.Wakeman@Gmail.com. Follow me on Twitter.

Morning Links: Tupac Shooter Confesses, Selena Gomez Blames Junk Food For Hospital Trip

● First Alec, and now youngest and “kookiest” Baldwin, Stephen wants a New York mayoral run. What, again, was wrong with Weiner? [Gothamist] ● According to AllHipHop, Dexter Isaac has confessed to shooting Tupac Shakur outside Quad Studios in 1994, earning $2,500 from music exec Jimmy Henchmen for the hit. Isaac is currently serving a life sentence for another crime, and Henchman is on the lam. Today would have been Tupac’s 40th birthday. [AHH] ● Lil B copped, ever so slightly, on his boldly titled new album, adding the parenthetical “(I’m Happy)” to I’m Gay on the official, Marvin Gaye inspired cover art. [RapRadar]

● Selena Gomez wants to clarify: when she says she is malnourished, she doesn’t mean she’s not eating, she just means she loves M&Ms and Snickers at the movies and cheese on her broccoli. And anyways, her mom is making her take vitamins now. [People] ● James Franco, the man who has proven himself capable of doing almost anything — shelling invisible art, included — wishes he looked better in tank tops. [NYM] ● Bill Clinton admires the cast of Spider-Man‘s gumption: “And I am very proud of them for not giving up, it was fabulous,” he said after the premier. [PopWatch/EW]

Stephen Baldwin: King of Hollywood’s Right Wing Martyrs

Maybe it’s because I visit Big Hollywood too often, but I feel like there’s been an unusual amount of right-wing hand-wringing over how sorely put upon Hollywood conservatives are these days. Last week novelist/screenwriter Andrew Klavan did an interview in which he alleged conservatives within the industry have to “meet in secret” and “talk in whispers” for fear of losing work. Naturally, Big Hollywood had to get in on this, not only giving Klavan an additional soap box, but also firing off an editorial salvo of its own (courtesy of James Hudnall) in which it’s asserted that the current “blacklisting” of right wingers is dramatically worse than than anything ever visited upon the famed “Hollywood Ten”. It’s all incredibly hyperbolic stuff, but these guys have nothing on Stephen Baldwin, whose sense of paranoia and self-pity has reached a truly magnificent level.

You need look no farther for proof than the video for “Restore Stephen Baldwin,” an inspired piece of work that claims that Baldwin’s career doldrums and recent bankruptcy are not, as any sentient person might be inclined to think, owed to his being a fairly deplorable actor, but rather the result of his religious convictions. The video also compares Baldwin’s travails to the biblical Job and anticipates, should their fundraising prove successful, “the massive restoration of a Christian public figure.” I swear I am not making any of this up.

Stephen Baldwin Calls President Obama ‘Homey’

It’s common knowledge that Alec Baldwin leans hard to the left when it comes to politics. He’s never been shy about airing his opinions, and in a recent interview he even suggested that he may soon forego acting altogether in favor of some other line of work, viz.—elected office. But not all of the Baldwin brood shares Alec’s liberal inclinations. In fact, brother Stephen is an arch conservative who’s found a niche in talk radio (to say nothing of his countless reality tv appearances). He turned up yesterday at the annual CPAC conference, where he was charged with organizing the next generation of the Republican party faithful. He also managed to put his foot squarely in his mouth during an interview with ABC. Video after the jump.

“I’m gonna be real straight with you,” Baldwin told ABC’s Jonathan Karl. “I am not happy about the way things are. I pray for President Obama every single day. But tell you what. Homey made this bed, now he has got to lay in it.”

He gives good sound byte, no? Who else would mix clichéd metaphor with questionable terminology like “homey.” The Huffington Post has tried to stir the pot by insisting that the term unequivocally means “gang member,” but for my part it mostly conjures up an old In Living Color sketch. In any case, Baldwin should probably stick to scripted dialog in the future. His skill at extemporizing is nil.

Links: Hailey Glassman Gushes, Seth Rogen vs. ‘Entourage’

● Jon Gosselin’s new girlfriend Hailey Glassman is enjoying her 15 minutes of fame, gushing that Jon is “so strong” and the couple are “always laughing and joking” together. [People] ● Everyone’s least favorite Baldwin — that would be Stephen — has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy, citing he owes the state of New York more than $2.3 million. [Reuters] ● Sony Pictures has won the bidding war over Michael Jackson’s rehearsal footage; the studio paid $60 million and will release the concert film in October. [EW]

● Seth Rogen did not take kindly to being the butt of last Sunday’s Entourage episode, calling show creator Doug Ellin an “asshole” and “moron.” [Movieline] ● Random Couple Alert! All around celeb-whore Bai Ling and Nicole Richie’s daddy Lionel Richie were seen having a romantic dinner at the Viceroy in Santa Monica. [Dlisted] ● The Orange Oprah, a.k.a. Dina Lohan, wants to assure us that Lindsay’s future has never been brighter because as we all know Lindsay is a “genius [with] a good heart.” [OKMagazine]

Celeb Real Estate Update: Leona Lewis Buys Mansion, Stephen Baldwin Loses One

imageThere comes a time in every young pop star’s life when, in order to be taken seriously, she must learn to date people who don’t terminate relationships through text-messages. She must accept her fate as a purveyor of mediocrity and be content with her millions, while thanking the media overlords for not sullying her good name. For Simon Cowell side-project Leona Lewis, that time is now. And it’s marked by that dubious rite of passage that most of us twenty-nothings will probably never experience: property ownership!

It’s true! Leona’s a big girl now. She’s eyeing a converted barn in the British countryside, priced at £1 million. It’s the perfect retreat to from the brutal pressures beleaguering anyone of such elite celebrity. Or from her very songs, the same ones Radio 1 insist on playing hourly. Like all respectable rich people, Lewis also owns property in London, with her boyfriend. And yes, SiCo does have the spare key. [Digital Spy]

For about roughly that same amount, but in London proper, Sienna Miller has put her 2-bedroom/3 bath up for sale. Not only is it near all restaurants and Madonna-accessible (at least when she tears through the Isles), but the house also comes fully equipped with its own Turkish bath and sauna. Sadly, the best case scenario, Miller even stands to lose about £200,000. [The Real Estalker]

But because the world is unfair — yes, even to born-agains — Stephen Baldwin’s upstate New York abode is facing foreclosure. Which doesn’t exactly smack of total surprise because he is competing on I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here. The sprawling brick-and-mortar eyesore was supposed to be auctioned off in exactly a week. Even though a late-in-the-game rep insists otherwise, additionally whispering about a sprinkling of litigious fairydust that Baldwin’s throwing on this messy matter to make it go away. Which is unfortunate news for anyone who really took a liking to the home’s decor. [People]