In the wake of Friends, David Schwimmer has variously struggled to shed his Ross-ness by growing a beard and turning director. I avoided his last outing in the chair, Run, Fatboy, Run, chiefly because star Simon Pegg isn’t fat, and I felt like, shit, if they were willing to compromise on that, what other corners might they cut? Now Schwimmer’s back with another film that I won’t see, only this time, it’s even more un-Rossy. How much? Well, let’s just say it’s an extremely self-serious look at internet predators and child molestation. That kind of thing sure never came up at Central Perk.
The blandly-titled Trust stars Clive Owen and Katherine Keener as the overprotective parents of a perfect teenage daughter who chats up the wrong psycho on the internet. I agree with famed-hater-of-the-color-orange Jeffrey Wells that it looks like the old vigilante routine re-jiggered for the modern age, but the foolishly optimistic part of me wants to think that perhaps there’s some sweet, sweet third-act reveal that’ll make this movie into something other than the trashy nonsense it looks like from afar. Not that that would ever get me into the theater, mind you.