Prudent Pop Star Nicole Scherzinger Confused About How Awards Work

I generally don’t pay much attention to anyone who has had any involvement in The Pussycat Dolls, but headlines like "Nicole Scherzinger Wishes She Were ‘More Slutty’ For The Sake Of Her Career" are definitely click-bait that works on me, given my propensity for hate-reading. So yes, Scherzinger is lamenting her "classy and sassy" status and how it has affected her career ambitions, namely that her prudent nature (for example, singing a lyric like, "Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was raw like me"). But here’s what really blows my mind about Nicole Scherzinger: she thinks she deserves all of the awards, and doesn’t understand how one achieves them.

In an interview with The Independent (via HuffPo), Scherzinger claims that her religious background has kept her grounded, but it has also limited her success. You know, because she’s not very slutty.

"This is such a tough industry, you know. To make it, you really have to sell your soul to the devil."

And has she?

She turns back to face the mirror, and closes her eyes. Her make-up artist resumes her work. "No, I haven’t. That’s probably why I haven’t quite reached the top of my mountain. I mean, where’s my Tony Award, my Grammy, my Oscar? Why don’t I have any of those things yet?"

Well, I can’t say why she doesn’t have a Grammy for her work with The Pussycat Dolls since they seem to handing that shit out to anybody these days, but as far as an Oscar and a Tony goes, I suppose it’s helpful to remind Scherzinger (and you, of course) that she has acted twice in Chasing Papi and Men in Black 3—neither of those are particularly Oscar-caliber titles. And it’s also pretty difficult to get a Tony if you’ve never appeared on Broadway. So, there’s your answer! 

Follow Tyler Coates on Twitter.

Britney Spears Joining ‘The X-Factor’

 

On the O.G. British version of the Simon Cowell-helmed talent-search glitter explosion that spawned One Direction, the judging panel includes a couple of major ‘90s pop veterans, including Take That (Robbie Williams’ boy band for those who spent those years outside of the UK or under a rock) frontman Gary Barlow and, up until recently, Girls Aloud member-turned-high-powered-WAG Cheryl Cole. The American version of the show, about to start its second season, will be taking the same route in enlisting former ‘90s tween/teen idols, when Britney Spears joins the panel next season on a $15 million deal, MTV reports.

Spears joins producer Antonio “L.A.” Reid, Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger and former American Idol judge Paula Abdul. Fans and industry folks are watching her move to the show carefully, considering she’s been spending so little time in the public eye since her last album. Is this a Britney Spears comeback? Is this all part of a larger and perhaps diabolical plan? As Spears super-fan Jordan Miller points out to MTV, her public image has been so heavily monitored in the wake of her 2007 breakdown that the opportunity to go unscripted in front of a wide audience is actually a huge deal for her, and, for what it’s worth, an opportunity for her to show audiences what she’s capable of when going off-book. And hey, for a fledgling pop star who could barely string a sentence together when “Baby… One More Time” was released, getting a thumbs-up from B. Spears could be a huge vote of confidence.

Season 2 of The X-Factor will premiere at the end of September 2012. 

Teenage Girl & Adult Lady Humiliated in Equal Measure on ‘The X-Factor’

I have never watched The X-Factor and I have not yet figured out how it is different from American Idol other than employing a Pussycat Doll and a man named "L.A." as judges. But last night’s elimination was so mind-blowing that even I, someone who usually despises reality TV competition shows that aren’t about designing dresses or tricking money-hungry women into fighting over a poor man, couldn’t avoid the clip of a poor 13-year-old’s complete emotional breakdown when the clip hit the internet this morning.

Here’s the gist, for those who sometimes need Cliffs Notes for what passes as pop culture these days: two contestants were vying for a spot in the semifinals. Their names are Rachel Crow and Marcus Canty. (I’m sure those are names you will hear once again, most likely on a VH1 special called The Top 100 Reality TV Contestants You Forgot About, Part Two.) Judge L.A. Reid throws in a vote for Marcus, while Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell show their support for Rachel. Fourth judge Nicole Scherzinger is left to make a decision: she could either vote for Rachel, therefore kicking Marcus off the show, or vote for Marcus to let the audience vote decide the pair’s fate.

Scherzinger, who is getting paid millions of dollars to judge a competition, basically throws her hands up in the air with tears in her eyes and refuses to make the decision we all can tell she wants to make. Instead of casting a third vote for Rachel, she blabbers on about how she can’t be responsible for making such a tough choice. "Please don’t cry," the 13-year-old girl tells the 33-year-old woman. Scherzinger sends the vote into a deadlock, and then the anonymously European host announces that the audience voted for Marcus to stay. And that’s when all hell breaks loose.

Do you enjoy watching the hopes and dreams of adolescents being crushed in front of millions of people? Would you like to watch as the heart of a child is ripped out in front of America and then crushed on stage with the spiked heel of a Pussycat Doll’s stiletto? Are you unable to imagine the sight of Simon Cowell consoling a weeping teenager? Well, congratulations, because this is where we’ve ended up as humans. Check out the goods at the 2:15 mark in the video below:

Links: Zoey Deschanel vs. Katy Perry, Dita Von Teese Enraged

● Has hell frozen over? Star Jones and Rosie O’Donell will be hosting a charity luncheon together. They can bond over the food. [US] ● Zooey Deschanel says the constant Katy Perry comparisons are getting “a little annoying,” cause the only thing they have in common are blunt bangs. [MTV] ● Kate Moss says although she’s not with child, she’s been pregnant for the last two years if tabloids were to be believed. [DigitalSpy]

Dita Von Teese is infuriated over reports she has been secretly sexting David Beckham. [DitaFan] ● Nicole Scherzinger knows that Britney Spears can “throw down” when it comes to dancing, and that’s why she would never have a dance-off with her. [MTV] ● Gale Harold, who played Teri Hatcher’s young boy-toy on Desperate Housewives, will return to the show May 3 after getting into a terrible motorcycle accident that sidelined his stint on the show. [EW]