Watch the Shiny New Trailer for the Oscars

The Oscars are less than two months away and after host and producer changes, ABC just released a promo to reassure everyone that it’s going to be A-Okay. The trailer, which comes via Movieline, is a highly produced narrative short about Josh Duhamel and Megan Fox’s journey to the Himalayas in order to find host Billy Crystal. 

Oh no! They aren’t saving the best stuff for the show itself!

Besides Oscar mainstays Josh Duhamel and Megan Fox, the promo also stars Vinnie Jones as the bartender and a heavily made-up Robin Williams as the Mongolian ferryman. If there were an award for Best Oscar Promo, this would definitely, without question, get a nomination.

Prediction: "You could’ve just texted" will become the catchphrase of 2012, narrowly edging out Crystal’s "You look marvelous" after it makes its inevtitable return during the Oscars broadcast,which airs February 26.

What Should VH1 Replace ‘Celebrity Rehab’ With?

VH1 announced they will not produce a season of their misery porn series Celebrity Rehab or its spin-off Sober House in 2012. As Entertainment Weekly points out, the show was put under scrutiny last year when two former cast members, Taxi star Jeff Conaway and Alice in Chains bassist Mike Starr, died from drug-related causes. VH1, however, just says the shows are off the network’s slate due to “scheduling issues.”

Because of Celebrity Rehab and Sober House’s absences, there will be a gaping void to fill in VH1’s line of programming. Where else are viewers going to find tragic examples of human depravity intercut with advertisements for skin cleanser? To help VH1, we’ve thought of some new shows they can run in their stead:

Homeless Celebrity Look-a-likes with Carmen Electra
Each week, Carmen Electra visits a homeless shelter and finds down-on-their-luck men and women who look just like your fave celebs!

How’d They Die?
This game show (hosted by Nick Lachey) asks contestants to recall how Hollywood stars kicked the bucket. Bonus points for last words!

Celebrity Detox
Pretty much the same thing as Celebrity Rehab, except it takes place in Austin. (Austin is hot now!)

Kick ‘em When They’re Down with Brock Lesner
UFC star Brock Lesner invites people to literally kick fallen celebrities in their rib cages.

Dumpster Divin’
A team of young, sexy guys and gals search through celebrities’ trash for old pill bottles and pregnancy tests.

Will.i.am Designs Car Because of Course He Does

Last night, the Black Eyed Peas’ will.i.am appeared on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno and debuted his newest venture: a car company. Rap-Up brings our attention to Mr. i.am’s project, which he has dubbed “IAMAUTO.” In related news, fellow Black Eyed Peas band member Taboo just had his credit approved for a new lease on a Kia Optima.

Will.i.am has become a successful musician, a creative force at Intel, a hologram, and now an auto executive. This is a testament to the American dream: If you put your mind to it and create bland, inoffensive pop music, you can achieve anything.

The IAMAUTO looks like if a DeLorean and a blow dryer had sex. The car may be off aesthetically, but will.i.am’s heart is in the right place — he wants to produce the car in the rough East Los Angeles neighborhood where he grew up. “I’m a big technology freak and a geek and I invested my money in building my own vehicle ’cause I want to bring jobs to the ghetto that I come from,” he told Leno. “I invested in making a demo to start the Black Eyed Peas, now I want to invest to have a car company in the neighborhood where I come from.”

The IAMAUTO uses Chrysler parts and has a Beats by Dr. Dre sound system. Unfortunately, that aforementioned sound system is capable of playing Black Eyed Peas songs.

Alec Baldwin’s Supermarket Commercial Ban Lifted

Thought Alec Baldwin’s Words With Friends/American Airlines scandal was over? Well, you’ve clearly underestimated our collective attention span when it comes to iPhone app-related jet way disturbances. TMZ reports that Wegmans, the Rochester, New York-based supermarket chain, had pulled holiday ads featuring Baldwin after they received complaints from a handful of customers. Now Wegmans has apologized and decided it will run the ads after even more people complained than the original complainers. Hopefully this whole ordeal will be sorted out by 2013.

A Wegmans representative told TMZ the following:

We regret ending the Alec Baldwin holiday commercials one week earlier than planned in response to a couple of dozen complaints. We have decided to run the commercials again, effective immediately… Clearly, many more people support Alec, as evidenced by the hundreds and hundreds of tweets, emails, and phone calls we have received. We enjoyed working with Alec Baldwin and his mom, Carol, and would do it again. We appreciate all the kind things they have said about Wegmans and respect the good work they do for communities.

So it’s settled. Alec Baldwin gets to use his iPhone during takeoff and landing. Wait, what were we talking about?

Donald Trump Announces ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ Cast List, Which Is Kind of Like Being President

Donald Trump announced to a group of ardent supporters in Des Moines this morning that his campaign has won the Iowa caucus by a wide margin, putting him in the driver’s seat for the New Hampshire primary. We’re sorry, that dispatch came from Donald Trump’s imagination. In reality, Trump went on Today and released the cast list for the newest intallment of The Celebrity Apprentice.

In a shocking development, you may have heard of over half the contestants:

  • Clay Aiken 
  • Michael Andretti
  • Teresa Giudice
  • Victoria Gotti
  • Lisa Lampanelli
  • Dayna Mendoza
  • Dee Snyder
  • Paul Teutul, Sr.
  • Arsenio Hall
  • Adam Carolla
  • Lou Ferrigno
  • Penn Jillette
  • George Takei
  • Cheryl Tiegs
  • Debbie Gibson
  • Tia Carrere
  • Aubrey O’Day
  • Patricia Velásquez

Instead of being asked, “President Trump, OPEC is unwilling to renegotiate regarding barrel surplus rates, what should we do?” The Donald will get to field questions from Clay Aiken about why he can’t work with George Takei on the lemonade stand challenge.

There are still people in the world who think Donald Trump should be president, and he hired them all to be on The Celebrity Apprentice. A group of eight contestants joined Trump on Today, and when asked if any of them thought he would make a good president, they all raised their hands.

I think we found the Donald’s 2016 cabinet.

D’Angelo’s ‘Black Hole Sun’ Cover is Very Good

Close your eyes and envision watching MTV back when music videos existed outside of Vimeo. There’s a strong chance that in your imagination you are viewing an iconic video like the one for Soundgarden’s “Black Hole Sun” or D’Angelo’s “Untitled (How Does it Feel?).” You would think those songs share nothing in common besides the videos that defined their respective slices of the past 20 years. Now, via Head Nodz, we have D’Angelo’s neo-soul cover of “Black Hole Sun,” which was just leaked onto the Internet to bring these two artists together.

D’Angelo and Soundgarden, it turns out, go together like pineapples and pepperoni pizza. You can’t figure out how the combination will work in your head, but then you take a bite and—BOOM—you realize how delicious Hawaiian pizza is. Take a taste:

This cover is reportedly from 2003 or 2004 (while other outlets suggest 2008), but languished on some hard drive before its recent leak. That’s an interesting time frame, considering it straddles D’Angelo’s rehab stint for alcoholism that was documented in this Spin story.

Funny how a cover of a mid-nineties alt-rock staple recorded years ago by a soul artist who reached the apex of his fame in 2000 sounds fresher than anything else being released nowadays. Hawaiian pizza truly is timeless.

Snoop Dogg Guest Stars on ‘The Price is Right’; Guesses Closest Without Going Over

Since the departure of Bob Barker and the death of announcer Rod Roddy, Price is Right purists have watched the show with a speculative eye. New host Drew Carey pays respects to the show’s traditions (uses a thin, long microphone; reminds viewers to spay and neuter their pets), but every single change and update is highly scrutinized. That’s why, when Snoop Dogg guest starred yesterday morning, those purists may have been worried about the sanctity of their beloved Price is Right. Their fears were unfounded, however, as it turns out that the D-O double-G is himself a Price is Right die-hard and absolutely nailed his appearance.

Snoop was on to raise money for his Snoop Youth Football League and wound up making $72,585. That’s one hell of a haul, but it quickly became evident that Snoop Dogg knows his way around a Plinko board. Check out his guest announcing duties on the Showcase Showdown. Rod Roddy would be so proud.

[via Rap Radar]

Watch Clive Owen’s ‘Delicioso’ Spanish Burger King Ad

A celebrity going oversees to film commercials is nothing new. It gives him or her the opportunity to be a mindless shill without damaging their sterling reputations here in the States. Thanks to YouTube, those days of backlash-free selling-out may be over. Example numero uno: Clive Owen’s Spanish Burger King commercial. Take a look at it after the jump. 

Clive didn’t take the time to learn Spanish for the role, so they dubbed over his Queen’s English.  The result looks like the director used the old Mr. Ed trick and coated his mouth with peanut butter to make it move. ¡Delicioso!

While it’s easy to make fun of Clive Owen for this cheesy Burger King commercial, it was even easier for him to earn an abhorrent sum of money from making it. Felicitaciones, señor Owen.

[via The Inspiration Room]

Kevin James Wins Redbox’s Lifetime Achievement Award

Awards season is here, and while members of the Academy are busy sipping Belvedere martinis and filling in their ballots, the most important honor has already been handed out. The Daily News informs us that Kevin James has received a lifetime achievement award from Redbox, the company that blocks supermarket entrances with massive DVD rental machines.

This is the first-ever Redbox lifetime achievement award, and it very well may be the last. Who can top Kevin James when it comes to a full lifetime of achievements? Redbox’s Gary Cohen tells the Daily News, “Kevin James is the guy next door, and Redbox fans have brought him home millions of times over.  Movies starring James include Zookeeper, Grown Ups, The Dilemma and Paul Blart: Mall Cop – making him a tried-and-true favorite who makes America laugh.”

He’s 100% right. Movies starring Kevin James do include Zookeeper, Grown Ups, The Dilemma, and Paul Blart: Mall Cop — a roster of films capable of defining multiple lifetimes. While Redbox has only been around since 2002, their recognition of a lifetime of work shouldn’t be disputed. They’ve probably seen all the movies, you know, because they get free DVDs from Redbox.