Top Ten Paris Clubs for Fashion Week Debauchery

Paris Fashion Week is upon us, along with the infamous parties. Following a full day of runway shows , you’ll find the models (and LiLo , of course) lifting their skirts at one of the clubs below. A word to the unbeautiful: you’ll have to be B-list or above to make it past the velvet rope this week.

Le Baron (Champs-Elysées) – You’ll find a smorgasbord of sloppy celebrities inside this Golden Triangle club. Or at least you would if you had any hope of getting in. Short of blowing the doorman, however, it’s not going to happen during Fashion Week.

Le Montana (Saint-Germain) – The painfully cool Montana is where you’ll find a bloated Freddy Beigbeder hitting on models half his age. Relatively new and absolutely of the moment, it’s owned by André (Le Baron) and a fashion photographer who likes to post the panty fest on his blog. ● Chez Moune (Pigalle) – The last Fashion Week (in March) left Chez Moune in disarray and with a growing reputation for debauchery. This historic Pigalle cabaret has been officially reincarnated as a late-night den for dirty dancing.

Le Régine (Champs-Elysées) – Outside of Fashion Week, this event space is pretty much off the radar. In March and October, however, it plays host to some of the most over-the-top fashion parties.

Maison Blanche (Champs-Elysées) – Starfuckers flock year-round to this Champs-Elysées perch for slick decor, sweeping views over the Seine, and jet-setty vibe. The main event during FW is a Saturday late-night bash with DJ Mel DeBarge.

Murano (Marais) More chill than the other club contenders, the Murano’s polar lounge, with its chalet-meets-2001 decor, is the perfect place to wear your new Rick Owens .

Chez Castel (Saint-Germain) – Sports stars, showbiz kids, fashion celebs and the odd politico love this lavish three-floor mansion. Plenty of private rooms and a basement dance floor.

Le Costes Bar (Champs-Elysées) – The bar’s reputation may be waning, but during FW the pretty people will still be sleeping here, and they’re gonna need a last drink.

Le Mathis (Champs-Elysées) – If you get past the discreet but difficult door of Le Mathis, you’ll find yourself in a small square bar, draped in red and looking every bit like an old brothel. It’ll be C-list during Fashion Week, but still…

Experimental Cocktail Club (Sentier) – Emptied out of its regular collection of beautifuls (off to invite-only parties elsewhere), the ECC may actually be managable during Fashion Week. The modern-day speakeasy, with its short list of creative sips, is always a delight.

Los Angeles: Top 10 Desserts

image1. Frittelli’s Doughnuts & Coffee (Beverly Hills) – Designer doughnuts in a variety of tastes, shapes, and sizes (think PB&J and butterscotch drizzle). Treats are made fresh daily, and for about a buck a piece, you can easily buy a few with your leftover laundry money. 2. Murano (West Hollywood) – Murano’s menu and dessert list recently underwent an authentic Italian overhaul, adding tiramisu and ricotta-style cheesecake. 3. Toast (Mid-City West) – The red velvet cake will change your life — and so might a chance run-in with one of the many Hollywood heavyweights who brunch here.

4. The Waffle (Hollywood) – Open way past bar close (4:30 a.m. on weekends), you can sober up with a baked hot chocolate or a sticky bun waffle before bed. 5. Luna Park (Mid-City West) – End a trendy meal with a do-it-yourself dessert. The s’mores come complete with a tiny flame brought to your table for perfectly toasted marshmallows — just watch your hair. 6. Osteria Mozza (Hollywood) – A fancy-shmancy splurge, rosemary olive oil cakes top the dessert list. 7. Lark Cake Shop (Silver Lake) – The ample array of cupcakes at this modern bakery includes chocolate-, caramel-, and mocha-tastic flavors. 8. Scoops Ice Cream (Koreatown) – The ever-evolving menu includes unique pairings like salty chocolate and Corona and lime, along with the usual suspects — strawberry cheesecake, brown bread, and several fruity flavors. 9. Axe (Venice) – The huge portions of homemade bread and chocolate-brownie puddings are well worth the $5 price tag. 10. Gyenari Korean BBQ & Lounge (Culver City) – This upscale Korean eatery focuses on light seasonal treats like the homemade shaved-ice trifle topped with fresh fruit and mango ice cream. Almost sounds healthy.

Los Angeles: The Essential Best-Of List

Other places might tell you which food trend was biggest in 2008, or which new restaurant made the biggest splash. But, everybody who’s sentient knows all that stuff already. Which is why we present the five truly important best-ofs here: things under the radar, that you’ll be glad to know.

Best mobbed-up restaurant: Some of the older L.A. restaurants have a bit of a Mafia feel to them, but it’s in a fun-times, Sinatra-style type of way. That’s Dan Tana’s, Musso & Frank’s…the boy’s club places. But Murano in West Hollywood is bringing new-school mob excitement to L.A. with Chris Paciello, who has come on board in a somewhat nebulous consultant/investor role. He’s out here scrubbing “Murder” graffiti off Murano’s walls after a stint in jail and a misspent youth in Miami…and that’s all we know for now. Oh, and the pasta’s really good!

Best server to make you feel like a princess: Maurizio at Melograno. Hands down. Or up. Whatever. This Sardinian charmer has perfected the eye-twinkling accented thing, the stop-for-a-moment-and-gasp-when-he-sees-you thing, and we fall for it every time. Happily. He’ll even ask simple questions in Italian, making the ladies feel international and glamorous. If Maurizio could be eaten with a spoon…he’d be all gone already.

Best use of the ingredient of the year: If we have to talk about food for a moment, let’s at least mention every chef’s favorite ingredient: pork. We’re pretty sure even vegan places were offering it this year. But the re-vamped Max in Sherman Oaks made the best use of the piggy: Kurubota pork belly with greens and peaches. So simple, so heart-stoppingly rich. It gives carnivores a reason to look forward to peach season.

Best fusion that doesn’t know it: While fusion is a buzzword that long ago became a punch line, the concept itself is still going strong: new American wouldn’t exist without it. And the upscale joints that serve it do so consciously. Which is why Kouraku serves the best fusion in the city: they don’t care if it’s hip, they just know it’s delicious. Greasy and perfect for 3 a.m. Don’t bring your friends who think Chinese and Japanese are the same thing, as this will seem to prove their feeble point right. But man, those two cuisines are a perfect dinner match, right there on the same plate in the middle of the night, under fluorescent lights, paired with an obscenely large beer.

Best place to probably get a handjob: We’re just saying “probably,” okay? But still, Tapas and Wine Bar C just feels kind of shady. The all-female servers wear costumes, usually of the French maid variety. Is it cute because they’re Japanese? Is it dirty for that same reason? The red walls and pink carpet, along with the lack of people actually eating, makes it seem ever more squeezer-friendly. The servers sit down, and the doorman tries to assure people reading the menu that “it’s just a regular place, really!” Dude…then why are you trying so hard?

LA Lesbian-Friendly Wining & Dining

imageWe covered the parties, now here’s the pads (so to speak). Ladies, meet the Los Angeles lesbian contingent. Prada mixed with trucker hats, cowboy boots and mini-skirts — there’s a veritable smorgasbord of women seeking same.

Ariya, known around town and referenced on The L Word as “Lesbian Sushi,” is a sure bet for running into the fairer sex. Any night of the week you can find the patio filled with girls. Don’t leave without ordering one or five of the OMG rolls.

Move from surf to turf at Jar, a 194’s American chop-house. Lesbian chef and owner Suzanne Tracht has a rep for some of the best steaks in Los Angeles. The bar and restaurant are packed every night of the week with the non-vegetarian varietal of lesbian. Try the burger — it’s not on the menu but is available at the bar.

Ciudad, Mary Sue Milliken and Susan Feniger’s downtown Los Angeles restaurant, has the east-side scene covered. Don’t miss the ceviches or the Latin-influenced desserts.

Club promoters Sandy Sachs and Robin Gans of Girl Bar fame teamed up with Jeffery Sanker of White Party (though Sanker’s since moved on) to create Murano, conveniently located within stumbling distance of the best gay clubs in the area. Show up between 8 and 10 p.m. to call shotgun on the brunette with the sleeve tattoo before heading out.

Saint Felix, née Bin 8945, in West Hollywood is also a prime gathering spot for Sapphic beauties fueling up before dancing it off. Tapas, sangria, and hot waitstaff make an irresistible combination.