Straight Women On Grindr Still Think All Gay Men Are Stanford Blatch Or Something

Ah, the unstoppable force of Grindr, an app so powerful its spawn are even spawning. The location-based app has led to fellow spinoffs for gay men (Manhunt Mobile, Scruff), a version for straight people (the equally shoddily-named Blendr) and even a Jewish version (Yenta, which sadly is nothing like this ad). But one unintended—but somewhat expected but still kinda gross—consequence of Grindr’s popularity has been the new trend of straight women using the service to find new Gay BFFs.

Down on the Buzzfeed farm, there’s a post featuring a number of women who are on Grindr looking for gay pals to do shopping and brunch and checking out guys together type things. The posters self-describe as “the ultimate hag” and fruit fly, and their requests aren’t much better—one user, Courtney, seeks “fun gay shopping partners! Let’s check out guys while we shop for shoes! J” Ashley’s tagline says she’s “Now accepting GBFF apps!” and that she’s “ready to talk about fashion, lady gaga, Tina turner and Zac Efron.” At least two use an outdated and hurtful term for transgender people that they probably thought was okay to use because Christian Siriano said it all the time on Project Runway that one season. So, that’s a great way to endear yourself.

As a disclaimer, the gay male population isn’t a monolith, and I don’t mean to speak for any one particular group or be offended for anybody, but I can safely say the gay men I know would probably find this pretty offensive. Having an open mind and wanting to meet new people is great and all, and it can’t be hard to find people, gay or not, who enjoy things like shopping and brunch and Tina Turner. Pretty much all people like brunch, and literally everyone loves Tina Turner. And there’s nothing wrong with looking for friends on the Internet—lots of people do that now.

But defining someone solely by their sexual orientation and choosing a friend solely based on that criteria and its stereotypical trappings, as opposed to seeing, you know, a person with goals and interests and fears and loves doesn’t make you more progressive or likable or whatever, it makes you, first and foremost, a shitty friend. And granted, certain friends do serve certain purposes, but that doesn’t mean you get to treat them like accessories. And if your perception of gay men is still the result of Sex and the City and Ryan Murphy-fronted sitcoms, then you actually legitimately do need to go out and meet actual gay people.

Come on, hasn’t Disappointing Gay Best Friend taught you anything?
 

Picking Out The Perfect Wedding Dress With The DIY Bride

Heyyyyy, ladies! I’m sure you all know that not only is your wedding day the most important day of your life, should you not have a wedding then you are a complete failure as a human being (until, of course, you are unable to conceive children) (or, until you are unable to balance a work life and a home life at the same time) (what the hell is wrong with you, do you not want to have it all?). Luckily for you, the DIY Bride is back to help you with this important, momentous occasion that will ultimately be the greatest indicator of your personal success and happiness! This week, the wedding expert shares a checklist for finding the perfect dress.

Obviously, the wedding dress is the centerpiece of the ceremony and, naturally, the marriage itself. If you screw up your dress, you’re likely to screw up your relationship with your perfect man. I’m sure most of you are thinking, "So, like, I just have to worry about it being strapless or sequined or white or off-white, depending on my sexual history and the judgment likely to come from the groom’s extended family members from the South?" Oh, you silly ladies, there’s so much more for you to worry about! 

Check out the video below!

Follow Tyler Coates on Twitter.

Be The Most Creative Bride You Can Be With “DIY Bride”

I think the best part about getting married—other than committing to someone for life, or, you know, a long time—is being the center of attention. Everyone has to look at you! It’s true! The RSVP includes three unspoken agreements: you will bring a gift, you will not get too drunk, and you will never take your eyes off of the bride, who has spent so much time shedding for the wedding and telling her Maid of Honor what to do and crying and threatening to murder her mother and/or the wedding planner and/or her husband-to-be. And if a bride is smart, she makes her wedding ALL HER OWN. Which is why any lady who is about to head down the aisle should watch "DIY Bride."

There are certain expectations for the bride, as well. Sure, you can Bridezilla all over the place, but you better bring your own style and personality into the mix. Who likes a boring, cookie-cutter bride? With the help of my friend Mikala Bierma, any bride-to-be can take some extra steps to creating her own special day even more special and her own. And what’s one of the most important parts about a bride? FLOWERS, duh!

 

Follow Tyler Coates on Twitter.

‘Asshole in a Relationship’ Explores the Worst Part About Being Single

For us single people, it’s sometimes tough to be constantly reminded of how awesome it is to be in a committed relationship with the love of your life. It’s no fun to watch our coupled friends brag about how loved they are. For the rest of us Bridget Joneses, living in constant fear of the next time we’ll accidentally run outside in just our underpants (don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about, people) and embarrass ourselves in front of potential suitors, there’s little to ease the pain inflicted upon us by those terrible, awful friends who are just so goddamn romantically fulfilled all the time. Luckily, there are some people who understand how we feel; the result is the hilarious mini web series "Asshole in a Relationship."

Starring Mikala Bierma (partially responsible for the amazing Stand-Up Dog and my partner in gluten-hating crime) and Emmy Blotnick, the series is short and sweet, and it finally gives a silent voice to those of us who are seemingly surrounded by friends who can’t keep from gushing about their wonderful partners. Check out the videos below!

Three Hot Tips for Living a Gluten-Free Lifestyle

My friend Mikala and I really care about leading healthy, active lifestyles, and with this whole gluten-free thing sweeping the nation, we decided to check it out for ourselves. Will we ever have stomach aches again? Will our immune systems be strengthened and keep us from getting one of those nasty summer colds? Will I be able to live without beer? Will Mikala live without beer that, in her own words, "tastes like juice?"

Luckily for us—and for you, dear reader—living a gluten-free lifestyle is pretty darn simple! Watch the two us give the tips that we’ve learned on this new health kick we’ve discovered!

Stand-Up Dog Is Prepared For You to Ignore His Facebook Invites

Stand-Up Dog is back, and we’re pleased as punch that he’s gotten himself a gig! That’s right: our boy is moving up the comedy ladder! Now, of course, comes the hard part: figuring out how to promote the show.

Obviously, in this digital modern age, the most reliable way to pester your friends about your improv shows and art openings is Facebook. Where else can you easily invite everyone you know across the country to your comedy show in Omaha? Oh, poor Stand-Up Dog. I’m sorry I couldn’t make it; I just never check Facebook!

Previously in Stand-Up Dog: the existential pressures of writing a pilot, the eternally terrifying open-mic night.

‘Stand-Up Dog’ Returns to Work on His Pilot

Last week we brought you the premiere of Stand-Up Dog, a new webseries about a lovably neurotic Boston terrier turned stand-up comic who faces the same artistic personal crises as the rest of us. But, you know, with funnier-looking eyeballs.

Here, our hero struggles with the first draft of his pilot, which is somewhere between Arrested Development and Girls. I have to say, at least he’s staying current. All of my pilots end up reading like a cross between Mr. Belvedere and Madame’s Place. Check out the video below!

‘Stand-Up Dog’ Proves Being Funny Isn’t Always Easy

You might think being a stand-up comic is all LOLs and LMAOs, but sometimes the crippling fear of getting out of bed to trek across town for a seven-minute slot at some sports bar’s open mic night is so overwhelming, especially when you’re worried about how well your political blowjob jokes are going to go over. 

In the first episode of the new webseries "Stand-Up Dog," created by Mikala Bierma and Mike Lacher, the titular character struggles with those familiar insecurities that we all face sometimes. I mean, how is your Chilean miner joke?