The Met Costume Gala: The Good, the Bad, the Ugly

Last night was the annual Costume Institute Ball at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City, a yearly event in which the biggest A-list stars and some models I’ve never heard of gather together in crazy dresses to take pictures on a red carpet. It’s like the Oscars, but nobody gets an award and everyone looks like a total weirdo. It’s very fashion-forward! And, per usual, there were some hits, misses, and some outfits that looked like LSD flashbacks. Click through to see our photo gallery of this year’s stand-outs!

Everyone On ‘Glee’ Is Going to Have Sex Tonight

Tonight is a big night for tweens who are into people who sing auto-tuned musical theater versions of pop songs. Four of the main characters on Glee are going to lose their v-cards in a very special episode that is sure to get a few conservative groups riled up, especially since one pair of amorous teens are—hold on to your hats—boys!

Yes, Kurt and Blaine are gonna do it, and yes, "Kurt" and "Blaine" are gay dudes. The folks at the Parents Television Council aren’t too happy with the subtley titled episode, "The First Time," and they swear that it’s not just because of that whole gay thing. "The gender of the high school characters involved is irrelevant. Teen sex is now more prevalent on TV than adult sex and ‘Glee’ is only playing into that trend,” said President Tim Winter. He claims that research shows that depictions of sex makes real-life teenagers have sex, completely discounting the fact that most teenagers are full of crazy hormones and spend most of their time fantasizing about rubbing their private parts all over everything.

Glee star Chris Colfer, who has won a Golden Globe for his portrayal of Kurt, tells TV Line that the sex scene was "handled very well," But he also gave further details that proves that it was, in fact, pretty tame and lame. "I think having two gay guys having sex on television was enough," he revealed. "They didn’t want to [reveal] a bunch of skin on top of it…. [Ultimately], I wore a T-shirt."

Well, as long as the show avoids realism at all costs, it makes perfect sense that they’ll have a shirts-on gay sex scene. Meanwhile, Lea Michele prepped her co-star and on-screen love-interest Cory Monteith for their characters Rachel and Finn’s (that’s a girl and a boy, btw) sex scene: "So I was like, ‘Listen, Monteith. We’ve got to do better than them. We’ve got to turn these people on! And we have to top those boys!’" Sure. That seems about right. 

‘New Year’s Eve’: Yet Another Star-Studded Holiday-Themed Rom Com

If the trailer is any indication, Garry Marshall’s newest film, New Year’s Eve, is almost exactly the same as his last film, Valentine’s Day, except with a different over-hyped holiday. Despite – or perhaps because of – its long list of incredibly famous actors and numerous romantic story lines, it’s stacking up to be yet another trite, cliched, and ultimately uninspiring smorgasbord of self-regard disguised as self-deprecation. How did the man responsible for The Odd Couple and Happy Days get to this point? Let’s take a trip down celluloid memory lane.

First came Love Actually, the film filled with some famous people and some-not-so famous people, all of whom shared universal love stories that intertwined in subtle yet real ways. It was about sex, love, romance, and best of all, Christmas. Bonus points for all the British accents. We loved it.

Then came Valentine’s Day, the wanna-be Love Actually filled with even more famous people and intertwining love stories. Too many, in fact – it made us a bit dizzy. And because it was centered around one of the most cliched days of the year, it was just too much mush, gush, and teen tonsil honkey. No thanks.

Now comes New Year’s Eve, following directly in the footsteps of Valentine’s Day. New Year’s Eve boasts an impressive cast of everyone who’s anyone in Hollywood. We’ve got Lea Michele, Jon Bon Jovi, Hilary Swank, Jessica Biel, and about a million more. How Marshall locked down Robert De Niro for such a silly movie is a mystery for the ages, but I guess De Niro gave up around the time Analyze That came out.

This film celebrates that one magical night every year when the entire world gets together to celebrate new beginnings, the wonders of alcohol, and the hopes of getting a little midnight action. With Ashton Kutcher’s “I’m depressed and I only wear sweatpants” mood, a random romance between Ludacris and Hilary Swank, and Zac Efron making dreams come true for Michelle Pfeiffer, I just might gouge my eyes out. There is nothing about this film that makes me curious, and I definitely plan on spending my New Year’s Eve doing other things besides watching Sarah Jessica Parker pretend to not have any opportunities to wear pretty dresses.

But who knows? Marshall may well surprise us with a well-crafted tale of love in the city of big dreams. But it’s looking like he’d prefer to squeeze a few more bucks out of a once-endearing idea, and that’s hardly in the spirit of “out with the old, in with the new.”

Roundup: All the Famous-People Stuff that Happened at Coachella

While you were sitting in your unfashionable apartment trying to watch a choppy stream of The Strokes’ set at Coachella this weekend, Christopher Mintz-Plasse was busy at the actual Coachella, gladly assuming the role of McLovin’ and getting mega-laid because of it. But he isn’t the only human being who used their celebrity to have an above-average time in the desert. Here’s a breathless roundup of the kooky shenanigans those crazy Hollywood kids got into at the annual music and arts festival.

While Russell Brand handled Arthur promotional duties overseas, Katy Perry dressed like a flower child and caught the Sleigh Bells set. She also dug sets by Robyn, Empire of the Sun, and Kanye. Vanessa Hudgens potentially did MDMA, while her boyfriend, Josh Hutcherson, potentially got a tan. Danny DeVito furthered his reputation as Coachella’s most legendary attendee. Lea Michele acted like a total B. Lindsay Lohan showed up with a camera and a smile. Robert Downey Jr. went incognito behind Tony Stark’s facial hair. Ke$ha hawked Converse and protested American imperialism, all at once. Camilla Belle ate BBQ! Penn Badgley ate pizza! Leo DiCaprio marked the occasion by blinging out his standard outfit with a glow necklace. Rosario Dawson popped by the Belve Music Lounge, where Chad Hugo, Taryn Manning, and other spun beats. Everyone else went to the neon carnival and presumably got bombed. Fun times!

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Links: Taylor Swift Writes John Mayer Break-Up Song, Christina Aguilera Rebounds With Sam Ronson?

● The song “Dear John,” from Taylor Swift’s upcoming album, seems to quite obviously be about her tryst with the notoriously sleazy John Mayer, including lyrics like, “Don’t you think I was too young to be messed with?” [PopEater] ● The cast of Glee, most notably Lea Michele, went nearly naked and highly sexual for a Terry Richardson photo shoot. “I don’t know how they got me to do half the stuff I did,” said Michele. Never put down your drink, honey. [GQ] ● Tom Bosley, best known as the father Howard Cunningham on Happy Days, is dead at 83, after suffering heart failure. [HuffPo]

● Rumors that Christina Aguilera’s “sexual freedom” broke up her marriage to Jordan Bratman are being ramped up by photos of her out and about with Lindsay Lohan’s ex-girlfriend Samatha Ronson. Imagine how much money Ronson could make selling her presence to restart careers. [X17] ● A man claiming to be Angelina Jolie’s cocaine dealer says the actress was high during an appearance with Charlie Rose in 2000. Now that she’s a loving mother of 13, it’s easy to forget that at the time we expected these things. [Page Six] ● Remember in the ’90s when everyone wanted to see both Tom Cruise shirtless and another Mission Impossible movie? Those days don’t have to be over. [Vulture]