All the Best, Worst & Most WTF Moments from This Year’s Met Gala

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photo by John Shearer/Getty Images

 

So, last night was the Met Gala. What used to be just an event to celebrate the opening of the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s newest exhibition, has become one the biggest night’s in fashion. That means lots of amazing gowns, horrible looks and tons of WTF moments. This year, we put together a list of all three.

 

First, for the night’s best moments:

 

SZA in Versace and Chris Habana head piece and jewelry

 

photo by Dia Dipasupil/Getty Images
For her first Met Gala, SZA paired pastel Versace with BlackBook favorite Chris Habana head wear and jewelry. Literally heavenly.

 

Nicki Minaj in Oscar de la Renta and Tiffany & Co. jewelry

 

photo by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images
Coming off of her double feature “Chun-Li” and “Barbie Tingz” video premiere last week, we had high hopes for Nicki. Needless to say, she didn’t disappoint. In a red and black Oscar de la Renta gown, the rapper told photographers she interpreted the theme by dressing as “the devil.” If Lucifer looks like this good, consider us Satanist.

 

Rihanna in custom Maison Martin Margiela by John Galliano and Maria Tash and Cartier jewelry

 

photo by John Shearer/Getty Images
Seriously, bow down. Rihanna’s custom Margiela by John Galliano ‘fit wasn’t just a look — it was a moment. And after last night, Queen Rih has just become The Pope.

 

Kate Bosworth in Oscar de la Renta and Tacori jewelry

 

photo by Getty Images
I usually find Kate Bosworth pretty boring — and I’m not just talking about her acting. But this Oscar de la Renta look was practically perfect. The gold, white, train and veil combo makes me not want to fight with my boyfriend long enough to actually get married.

 

Cardi B in Moschino

 

photo by Frazer Harrison/FilmMagic
Sorry Bey, there’s a new queen in town and her name is Cardi B. The “Bartier Cardi” singer looked like The Virgin Mary in her Moshino gown and headpiece, baby bump and all.

 

Diane Kruger in Prabal Gurung, Tasaki jewelry and a Philip Treacy x Tasaki headpiece

 

photo by Karwai Tang/Getty Images
Diane Kruger gets our vote for best dressed for the night. Her Prabal Gurun gown may not have been totally on-theme, but the entire look was a religious experience.

 

Solange in Iris Van Herpen and Lorraine Schwartz jewelry

 

photo by Dia Dipasupil/Getty Images
Solange’s Iris Van Herpen dress was our other favorite look of the night. The total opposite of Diane Kruger’s sweet blue dress and train, this look was like a sexy bondage Medusa moment that made me a full believer. Okay, that was the last religious pun, I promise.

 

Lily Collins in Givenchy Haute Couture

 

photo by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images
To be honest, I don’t really know who Lily Collins is. I think she’s a model-turned-actress. But really, aren’t they all? Either way, I don’t really care who she is, because her Givenchy Haute Couture dress and avant-garde makeup were absolutely stunning.

 

Lana Del Rey in Gucci

 

photo by Dia Dipasupil/WireImage
Jared Leto looked absolutely ridiculous in his overdone Gucci look, but Lana Del Rey pulled her’s off perfectly. Though, that’s partly because she always kind of looks like she’s in costume.

 

Priyanka Chopra in Ralph Lauren

 

photo by Getty Images
I didn’t see Priyanka Chopra on enough “Best Dressed” lists today. Her velvet Ralph Lauren look gave me serious Joan of Arc vibes — in a good way.

 

And now for the worst. It’s actually kind of sad when celebrities get it this wrong. For one thing, they’re paying stylists a ton of money to fuck them onto the “Worst Dressed List.” But also, you can tell when they’re posing on the red carpet that they think they totally nailed it. Sorry, guys. Better luck next time.

 

Mary J. Blige in Versace

 

photo by Neilson Barnard/Getty Images
Let me start this by saying I really do love Mary J. Blige. But the girl’s a serious fashion victim. I honestly can’t remember one time I thought she didn’t look ridiculous. I mean, Mary J. loves herself a fedora. And remember the “Family Affair” video? Just tragic. Last night, she tried to amp things up with a Versace gown, but just looked like a kind of sloppy Greek goddess.

 

The Olsen Twins in vintage Paco Rabanne

 

photo by Getty Images
It honestly baffles me how I spent so many years worshiping the Olsen Twins. I used to seriously — and I mean this in a literal way — take notes during their shows and straight-to-VHS movies, trying to outline how to dress as cool as them. Of course, Mary-Kate spawned the whole bohobo thing, which I readily adopted for a few seconds. But that was like, 2006, and now, the whole oversized thing with way too much jewelry is just kind of depressing.

 

Cara Delevingne in Dior Haute Couture and Bulgari jewelry

 

photo by REX/Shutterstock
We have to forgive Cara Delevingne for this look, because she clearly couldn’t see herself in the mirror with that headdress. The Dior Haute Couture gown looked like a giant fishnet stocking.

 

Madonna in Jean Paul Gaultier

 

photo by John Shearer/Getty Images
Oh, and about those fishnet stockings — apparently, Madonna also got the memo. The sad part is, this look actually could’ve been good if it weren’t for its entire top half. Though, she gets some points for her crown — it was epic.

Sarah Jessica Parker in Dolce & Gabbana and Jennifer Fischer jewelry

 

photo by Frazer Harrison/Getty Images
At least no can ever say that Sarah Jessica Parker doesn’t go for it. Out of every celebrity, she always leans fully in to the Met Gala’s theme. Unfortunately, this year, it didn’t do her any favors.

 

But of course, for all the good and bad looks this year, there were also a few WTF moments. I mean, what’s a celebrity event without a nip slip or some self-aggrandizing? I’m looking at you, Jaden.

 

Frances McDormand in Valentino

 

photo by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images
I actually wanted to like Frances McDormand’s Valentino look, if only for the fact that when a reporter asked her about the religious theme, she replied, “I’m a pagan.” But alas, it wasn’t enough to make up for this trainwreck. I will say, though, if I had to imagine what a pagan high fashion look would be, it wouldn’t be too far from this.

Katy Perry in Versace

 

photo by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images
I’m not sure if this is a real WTF moment, it’s just bad — and really big.

 

Kim Kardashian in custom Versace and Lorraine Schwartz jewelry

 

photo by John Shearer/Getty Images
This one’s a WTF for a different reason. See, I actually liked Kim Kardashian’s Versace dress, but I feel like it was kind of understated — at least, for the Kardashian-West clan. With the religious theme and everything, I figured Kimye would show up decked out in t-shirts with their faces screenprinted on them. “No, you’re brilliant Kanye,” “No you are Kim.” Ah, what a love story.

 

Grimes in who cares because she’s dating Elon Musk?

 

photo by Neilson Barnard/Getty Images
I know. What? Grimes showed up in a sloppy dress and those platform Marc Jacobs shoes we’ve already seen everywhere for like, two seasons. But for someone who prides herself on being weird, the weirdest thing she’s ever done was show up to the Met Gala with Elon Musk, only to reveal that they two are actually dating.

 

Last but not least: Jaden Smith in Louis Vuitton and carrying his own gold record

 

photo by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images
I really didn’t think Jaden Smith would go this far. Oh wait, yes I did. The singer showed up wearing Louis Vuitton and holding his own gold record. We get it, bro. You’re super smart and way too philosophical for the rest of us pesky humans. But even Kanye isn’t this blatant.

Oh well, at least we have awhile until we have to see what Jaden Smith will wear next year.

 

Madonna and Justin Bieber Are Stealing Jobs from Hard Working Models

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Illustration: Joseph Larkowsky

Last night, as part of my quest for a better lifestyle after 2014’s debauchery and body battering, I went on my first ever sober evening date. No booze was consumed, I was elated. On my way home however, after checking Instagram, it felt as if I had fallen off the wagon pre-Prohibition and never managed to get back on. Was I drunk? Was I going insane? It turns out neither, and I realized it was actually true…

Lara Stone, model du-jour, was draped as luxuriously as a Prada mink stole over the body of teenage ‘heartthrob’ (using the term extremely loosely) Justin Bieber, sporting nothing much but a hint of denim and a body full of questionable artwork, lensed by indestructible duo, Mert and Marcus. Bieber had apparently been signed as the new face of Calvin Klein underwear and denim. God help us all.

Now, you don’t have to be a ‘Belieber’ to realize what a technically clever stunt this was from the branding team. Working with one of the world’s most talked about auto-tuned schoolboy, sweetheart Disney Prince looking. Screen-king turned DUI laden, protein shake guzzling, wannabe bad-boy extraordinaire, can only mean one thing; girls and flustered cougars alike are gonna wanna buy those pants.

The problem I have with this is that already, fashion is a cut-throat and demanding environment for some, mostly models, and the constant battles to land campaigns and deals to actually make a living means that modeling, as simple as it looks to outsiders, is one of the most brutal industries around. At least stock market traders already have money to throw about. Add to the equation that narcissistic (and again already extremely wealthy) celebrities, many of whom are trying to relaunch careers, are taking the jobs that are already very few and far between.

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Versace illustrated by Joseph Larkowsky

Case and point made with the current Versace Spring 2015 campaign starring none other than the over-photoshopped singer Madonna. Donatella made a serious effort to push the idea of youth and new beginnings backstage after her show in Milan last September, but hiring a girl like Anna Ewers or Lexi Boling who do evoke a young Versace ideal would be a ludicrous suggestion when Madonna is trying to launch a new album. Since when did someone else’s advertising campaign become the new platform to sell your own garbage? The debate over if Vogue should sport more models than actresses on its covers is a mundane and pointless battle which nobody will ever win, but when Nicki Minaj, a woman famed for her Gluteus Maximus and pink wigs lands a campaign for Roberto Cavalli, you have to really reassess the situation. Same is to be said for famed (half for nothing) super couple Kimye landing the Spring 2014 menswear campaign for Balmain, with BFF Olivier Rousteing at the helm. I just cant imagine how they landed that! (If you think women’s modeling is hard, don’t even get me started on the world of the male model.)

One of the brands that is actually famed for using celebrities in their campaigns is Miu Miu, but unlike the tabloid hungry powerhouses, the cast is a little more unpredictable than the cover of US Weekly. Up and coming actress Stacy Martin was picked to front the Fall 2014 campaign, with previous faces including Lupita Nyong’o, Bella Thorne, newly cited Bond Girl Adele Exarchopoulos, and most frequently, Imogen Poots for SS15. These girls are not household names, but are trying to forge out careers for themselves just the same.

Fashion constantly batters us with a barrage of “new talent,” continuously reminding us that they are ‘investing’ and ‘nurturing’, all key buzz words in the world of convincing consumerism; however, I feel it’s time to hang up the tawdry celebrity, leave them for the covers of numerous glossies parading as fashion magazines, and give back the campaign to the model! After all, it is their job.

Top 3 Kimye Wedding Crashers

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Well… it happened. The #worldsmosttalkedaboutcouple finally tied the knot this weekend in Florence at the famous Forte di Belvedere amongst their closest family and friends in a “private” ceremony that they were no doubt paid millions of dollars by the E! Channel to broadcast in some horrible television special that we will ALL watch and say we didn’t. While her Givenchy couture wedding dress, Lana Del Rey pre-wedding pouty serenade, and lengthy celeb guest list (our invite got lost in the mail, obvz) are all notable talking points, here are three of our favorite moments that’ve been circling the media, keeping us talking…

Beyonce’s Shady Insta
Queen Bey was nowhere to be found at the ceremony despite Kimye’s (desperate) attempt to get the singer and her hubz there. Yonce instead instagrammed herself lounging very much not in Italy just moments before the ceremony, because, what’s a Kardashian?? Right after, she posted a pic of the (second most) royal fam of hip hop, wishing them a “lifetime of unconditional love” which actually meant, “Hopefully this lasts more than 72 hours.”

Beliebers Storm the Fountain
Italian Beliebers were out in the hundreds to get a glimpse of the “Baby” singer who was believed to be present at the nuptials, but were later disappointed to find out he was actually in Cannes doing normal dick things like posing in baby diaper harem pants with his douche-stash for the film festival.
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Rob Kardashian Crying Because Fat
While Kim’s baby bro was seen in Paris for the pre-celebrations, the newfound fatty skipped out on the ceremony because, well…he’s fat. According to the news, he’s been “working” on his weight and rather than join the fam in Italy he’d rather go cry over a pint of ice cream. It’s okay Rob…we’d rather do the same too.
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