Beyontroversé, Day Five: Super Bowl Setlist (May Have) Leaked So Can We Forget This Whole Thing?

So a lot of people are still bent out of shape about whether or not Beyoncé lip-synced the National Anthem at President Obama’s inauguration last weekend, and the whole thing is still pretty dumb. Because the fact is, whether or not she lip synced, she is still Beyoncé, and she still hangs out with the rulers of the free world and gets to come home to her loving family and her millions and a mailbox full of letters from adoring fans, so, you know, enjoy eating Spaghetti-O’s and reading updates from Perez’s dog in your empty apartment or whatever it is people who make a big deal out of these things do in their spare time. Anyway. 

The point is, who really cares, because more importantly, this is over and the next phase of Beyoncé’s global conquest is less than two weeks away. And US Weekly apparently have the setlist, which, take it with a grain of salt, but if this for real, it’s pretty flail-worthy. Bey will take the stage first to perform "Crazy In Love" (cross your fingers for cameos from Jay-Z and Blue Ivy), followed by Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams to reprise Destiny’s Child’s hits "Bills, Bills, Bills," "Survivor" and newcomer "Nuclear." Would have liked some "Bug-a-Boo" in there as well, but this song selection is more than satisfactory.

Now, people will inevitably ask, for the sake of being topical, is Beyoncé going to lip-sync? Even if she does, it will still be better than the unwatchable shells of themselves The Who have become, right? Being upset over not including Da Brat in the live performance of "Survivor," however, is entirely reasonable. 

And you know what? It’s Friday. It’s been a long week. You guys deserve a dance break. Without further adieu, here’s a Destiny’s Child video party. 

Destiny’s Child’s New Song ‘Nuclear’ Is So Meh

Destiny’s Child’s compilation album Love Songs is the first the group has done together since their 2006 breakup. So you’d think that the one new piece of material, a song called Nuclear, would be, well, nuclear. You would be a little wrong.

Love Songs doesn’t drop until January 29th and will include 13 already-recorded love songs from the R&B girl group, including Emotion and Cater 2 U, and one new song. Love songs are a curious choice, given how Destiny’s Child is most famous for girl power anthems like Survivor and Independent Women Part One, but I suppose they thought they could cash in before Valentine’s Day.

However, the only new song on the album is so "meh" they may as well have left it off Love Songs. You can listen below; honestly, I clicked away after only listening halfway through.

Beyoncé is performing at the Super Bowl and rumor has it that Michelle Williams and Kelly Rowland will join her onstage for a Destiny’s Child reunion. Please, give us some old school Survivor goodness and not this new disappointment? 

 

Contact the author of this post at Jessica.Wakeman@Gmail.com. Follow me on Twitter.

Linkage: Lady Gaga vs. The Osbournes, Robert Pattinson’s Underwear Modeling Days

When I first heard that Lady Gaga and Kelly Osbourne were in the middle of some feud, I thought, “Oh, over which has the worst hair color?” It turns out that it all has something to do with Osbourne’s association with Fashion Police, the Joan Rivers-hosted show on which Osbourne is a panelist. Osbourne revealed to Fabulous Magazine (catchy title, btw) that she was cyber-bullied by Gaga’s Little Monsters on Twitter. This led to Lady Gaga publishing an open letter, which incited Sharon Osbourne to write her own open letter. Here’s an open letter to all three: STFU. [People]

Yesterday we found out that Destiny’s Child would be releasing new music this year. Today it was confirmed that the trio will be performing together at the Super Bowl. Of course, this is Beyoncé’s world—we’re just living in it. (That goes for you, too, Kelly and Michelle.) The non-Beyoncés will join Our Queen onstage for a quick medley of Destiny’s Child tunes, including their new song “Nuclear.” [Us]

Did you know that Robert Pattinson was once an underwear model for a Chinese magazine? Did you also know that Robert Pattison used to look like a femme kd lang? [The Gloss]

Anne Hathaway won a Critics’ Choice Award, one of the many accolades for her Oscar-nominated performance as Fantine in Les Misérables (tough break, Sally Field). And then she pointed out how stupid they were for spelling her name “Ann.” [Jezebel]

Girls comes back on Sunday. How many semen-involved disasters will there be? [Hypervocal]

David Lynchheads better head to this makeshift Pink Lounge for the second annual Miss Twin Peaks Pageant. Who will be the sexiest Log Lady? [Gothamist]

It seems like every trailer could possibly be set to a song by The National, so why not Game of Thrones? [Indiewire]

Follow Tyler Coates on Twitter.

With Announcement of New Destiny’s Child Material, We May Be Approaching Peak Beyoncé

Just kidding. There’s no such thing as Peak Beyoncé. 

So far, this week, GQ, surprising no one, featured Beyoncé on the cover of their "Sexiest Woman of the Century" issue, which is fitting because there is just no one else who could possibly. Later this month, she will sing the national anthem at President Obama’s inauguration, and a couple weeks later, perform at a large, televised concert bookended by a decidedly less important football game and premiere a self-directed HBO documentary. How could Beyoncé possibly top this eternally-rolling snowball of domination? By remembering the ’90s, obvs. 

Destiny’s Child is back and releasing their first new track together in years to accompany Love Songs, a compilation of some of the R&B trio’s biggest, well, love songs, that will drop on January 29th. The album features slow-burners like "Emotion" and "Cater 2 U," along with "Nuclear," an all-new Pharrell-produced single. Let the Super Bowl reunion speculation begin, which would actually make up for several years of lackluster Super Bowl halftime shows. 

Should we have a video party? Let’s have a video party.

Big Boi Releases Studio Version of “Mama Told Me” With Kelly Rowland

Over the summer, Big Boi performed a rather sexy early live version of “Mama Told Me” at a live show alongside Swedish group Little Dragon. Rumors began to emerge that the group would be performing the track for Big Boi’s upcoming album, Vicious Lies and Dangerous Rumors (out November 13th), but a collab agreement wasn’t reached and Kelly Rowland stepped into the feature spot on “Mama Told Me.”

Rowland croons alongside a Nintendo-blip hook while Big Boi is up to his usual wordplay games, name-dropping nursery rhymes, Mozart and Michael Jordan. Have a listen below.

Destiny’s Child Has Been Hiding Previously Unreleased Songs From You

Bootylicious news, my friends. In an interview with the Huffington Post, Mathew Knowles — father of Beyoncé and former manager of the girl group Destiny’s Child — revealed the ladies have previously unreleased songs they are planning to release this November. Those bastards! How could you hold out on us, Bey?

What we really want, of course, is not just more pop tart material on the following themes:

  • I don’t need a man.
  • I can buy my own shit.
  • Did I mention I have a nice ass?
  • FEMINISM!

No, what we really want is for Beyoncé, Michelle Williams and Kelly Rowland to reunite for a Destiny’s Child reunion tour. Alas, Mr. Knowles basically told HuffPost not to hold its collective breath:

It takes a year of planning to do these tours, but first it starts with the artist wanting to do it. I hope in the next five years that there is a reunion tour. I think it would be incredible. The hardest thing would be choosing which songs they’re going to do, because we would want to mix it up with solo hits and Destiny’s Child hits. We would have to throw away some number ones from off the set list.

I guess Beyoncé is a little preoccupied with that having-a-newborn thing. But I can dream, can’t I?

Morning Links: Alec Baldwin Ditches the Emmys, Bravo Confirms ‘Housewives’ Firings

● Alec Baldwin ditched last night’s Emmys ceremony after Fox cut a phone-hacking joke from the pre-taped skit he’d done. “Fox did kill my NewsCorp hacking joke,” he later tweeted. “Which sucks bc I think it would have made them look better. A little.” [Deadline] ● Modern Family won the most Emmys, but Friday Night Lights‘ Kyle Chandler was able to sneak the Best Actor in a Drama award, so full hearts, you know? [NYT] ● After first making a terrible scene there, Lindsay Lohan left her cell phone at the Boom Boom Room. Lucky for her, a good Samaritan returned the phone without asking for a reward or leaking whatever sort of “personal stuff” she has on there. At least not yet. [TMZ]

● Jill Zarin, Alex McCord, Kelly Bensimon, and Cindy Barshop have been dropped from Real Housewives of New York because Bravo wants “the glamor of the ‘Sex and the City’ movies rather than the twitter wars and bickering.” Ouch. [HuffPost] ● Ryan Gosling says that in Sandra Bullock and Rachel McAdams he “had two of the greatest girlfriends of all time,” and he blames show business for making things impossible. “It takes all of the light, so nothing else can grow,” he told The Times. [Us] ● Jay-Z is none too pleased to hear that Kelly Rowland is headed out on tour with Chris Brown. [Digital Spy]

Morning Links: Kim Kardashian’s Music Video Leaks, Justin Bieber Named HIs Snake Johnson

● Dropped from the film when she got pregnant, Hillary Duff is reportedly walking away from Bonnie & Clyde with $100,000 in severance. Not bad for not a day’s work! [JustJared] ● Someone leaked a snippet of the music video for Kim Kardashian’s poorly received debut single, “Jam (Turn It Up).” Heavy on strobes lights and lip gloss, it doesn’t help the song’s cause. [Perez Hilton] ● Former fellow Destiny’s Child member Kelly Rowland says Beyoncé will be a great mother, “because she’s always been motherly. I think that she takes after so many traits from her mother. And I just think it’s going to be so natural for her. Its natural for her now!” [People]

● Justin Bieber brought his Johnson — his pet boa constrictor named Johnson, that it — with him to the VMAs. When asked why he brought it, he simply answered, “Why not?” Justin is sounding very, very much like a teenage boy these days. [Access Hollywood] ● Director Steven Soderbergh says he’s going to take a break from film in order to try his hand at painting. He’s not necessarily expecting success, though: “I’ll be the first person to say if I can’t be any good at it and run out of money. I’ll be back making another Ocean’s movie.” [THR] ● This is weird: apparently Solange Knowles was denied entrance to a Miami club because she was holding a 5-foot-tall inflatable banana. Upset, Knowles became unruly, complaining that she had been turned away for racial reasons. Then the fuzz threatened to deflate her banana. [TMZ]

Is A Destiny’s Child Reunion Really Happening?

The first single from Beyonce’s upcoming album, 4—the Major Lazer-sampled “Girls (Run The World)“— had a mediocre run on the music charts compared to her I Am…Sasha Fierce hits, like “Single Ladies.” Now, according to Page Six, execs at Columbia are worried that the album will be a flop. So worried, that they are reportedly working on a Destiny’s Child reunion and comeback album to generate some revenue. Sounds like an unlikely story.

A source told Page Six that that execs at Columbia are “very nervous about Beyonce’s new record” because it “doesn’t have the hit songs that her fans are used to” and “they asked her to make changes, but she said no.”

Sure, change in the form of off-the-wall samples don’t always appeal to mainstream, but things get a little ridiculous when the source goes on to add that “Beyonce’s career has stalled a bit” and “Columbia seems to think they can get some mileage out of a comeback record with all of the other girls.” Let’s rewind for a minute. When did Beyonce’s career stall? Was it when she covered the July issues of W magazine, L’Uomo Vogue, and kicked off her new tour in France? Or was it in May when she gave show stopping performances at the Billboard Music Awards and at Oprah’s Farewell performance. Or in April, when she starred in Michelle Obama’s anti-obesity childhood campaign? You get the point.

Even sillier is the thought of a Destiny’s Child reunion/comeback album timed while Beyonce is already on tour, is 6 days away from officially releasing her album, and Kelly Rowland is hitting the peak of her solo career. We’re calling bullshit on this one.