Morning Links: Jospeh Gordon-Levitt Joins Batman, Nicki Minaj To Join X-Factor

● Wyclef Jean was “grazed” in the hand by a bullet while campaigning for presidential candidate and fellow performer Michel “Sweet Micky” Martelly in Haiti this weekend. He’s taking antibiotics and is just fine, so back to the elections, guys? [AP] ● Nicest living boy in Hollywood Joseph Gordon-Levitt has officially signed on to play Alberto Falcone, the son of a mob boss, in Christopher Nolan’s third Batman film, The Dark Knight Rises. He’ll be joining Christian Bale, Anne Hathaway, and Tom Hardy. [Variety} ● Even though it’s Hong Kong-produced, mainland China won’t get to see much of the world’s very first 3D Porn, Sex & Zen: Extreme Ecstasy. Tour agencies are working quickly to resolve this injustice by booking trips to Taiwan for the most eager viewers. [Yahoo! Malaysia]

● “He reminds me a lot of me when I was younger,” Chris Brown said of adopted mentoree Justin Bieber. “I kind of try and be the big brother and make him go the right way and have a great time.” Now that we think of it, Justin seems to be doing just fine one his own. [JustJared] ● Nicki Minaj is in talks to join L.A. Reid as a judge on Simon Cowell’s imported version of The X Factor. She’s fit for the job: One look from Minaj is worth a lifetime of judging, but before making any promises, she needs to know that her shoes will be visible from under the judge’s bench. [Page Six] ● “[At SxSW] you have the greenest of the green, and the oldest, most poisoned of the fucking dinosaurs, walking next to each other in sunny Austin,” opined Bright Eyes’ Conor Oberst during his own SxSW set, now streaming in full on Spinner. He didn’t quite place himself in this equation, but you know how it goes: “Hard lines curved in your face/ The sunshine is so cliche/Just like love and pain.” [Spinner ● Most things you can do, Chad Ochocinco can do better. Or so he thinks. In lieu of an NFL lock-out, he’s decided he’ll be fulfilling his childhood dream of being a Major League Soccer star! The MLS has only been around since he was 17 years-old, but football/futbol — who’s counting? [NYT]