Lena Dunham Stops by Howard Stern’s Show to Respond to His Fat Jokes

After taking home two Golden Globes on Sunday for her show Girls, Lena Dunham has every reason to have all the confidence in the world—even in the face of ongoing repulsive and sexist comments about her body. Last week we were all mutually nauseated by Howard Stern’s remarks towards Dunham: “Good for her. It’s hard for little fat chicks to get anything going.” The following night, while on Late Night With David Letterman, Dunham proudly joked, “I wanna get it on my gravestone where he said, ‘Congrats to her (Dunham). It’s so hard for little fat chicks to get anything going these days.” And since then, Stern has openly apologized for his harsh words of judgement, paving the way for an appearance from Dunham herself his program today.

The pair had quite the conversation, and made nice during the interview.

What he had to say:

  • “I realize: not only am I addicted, but I totally get you. I’m in love with you and your character.”
  • “It’s not about apologizing, although I want to say I’m a fan of yours … I love you and I think you’re terrific.”

What she had to say:

  • “I’m a big fan of your particular brand of free speech.”
  • “Howard Stern says I’m ‘not obese or anything’ … I appreciate it and I appreciate your effort to rectify [this], but whether you’d done that or not, I’d have remained a [Howard Stern] enthusiast.
  • “I’m not super thin, but I’m thin for, like, Detroit.”

Now hold up just one second. This reminds me of that delightful line from that absurdist piece of humor that was Esquire‘s Megan Fox cover story, reading: “Women no longer need to be beautiful in order to express their talent. Lena Dunham and Adele and Lady Gaga and Amy Adams are all perfectly plain, and they are all at the top of their field.” What’s that sound, you say? Oh nothing, just me slamming my plainly average body against the wall. Are you kidding me? What world are these assholes living in where a woman should have to justify her body weight as per city-specified expectations? But okay, Dunham isn’t taking this too seriously, and it feels silly to get worked up when the subject of the discussion is strong enough to shake off this sort of thing. However, it does reflect that fact that, yes, a bold and talented 26-year old woman just won two Golden Globes against American staples of comedy, but you’re right, we really should be discussing those extra few pounds.

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Howard Stern Apologizes For Calling Lena Dunham Fat (Sort Of)

"It’s a little fat girl who kinda looks like Jonah Hill and she keeps taking her clothes off and it kind of feels like rape," said Howard Stern in an attempt to describe Lena Dunham’s Girls. Quite a classy move! Obviously, people got a bit upset, as they are wont to do when a dude calls a woman fat in public, and Stern has already apologized for his comments. Kind of. 

Yesterday on his show, Stern "clarified" his comments (which you can hear in the video below, via The Observer), which basically come down to this: Lena Dunham is still a fat little girl, but he likes Girls and hopes Dunham doesn’t think he doesn’t like her. And he hopes he comes on her show. Looks like someone figured out that talking about Lena Dunham is great for ratings (and, um, page views). 

Of course, the Golden Globe-winning actress and writer is taking it all in stride, as Howard Stern is likely not the first dude to call her fat. Dunham was on Letterman last Friday and told the host that she hopes to have Stern’s comments—"She was a little fat chick and she got it going."—on her tomsbtone. 

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Check Out Another Clip from Tonight’s ‘Girls’ Season Premiere

It’s a good night for television tonight, folks. The Golden Globes are finally here, but if you’re not one for scrutinizing outfits on the red carpet or just over awards season already, it’s also the premiere of the much-anticipated second season of Girls. According to Lena Dunham, who spoke about the show with David Letterman on Thursday night, this season "all the girls get new boyfriends, all the boys get new girlfriends, and then we’re just bringing’ the drama." She always went on to say, that if you hated the first season, "you’ll hate this one—a lot."

The sophomore season will take the cast on a series of new self-discoveries, mistakes, and themed-parties but Dunham also spoke to the reoccurrence of "the things that people objected to in the first season: the characters are self-involved, people who shouldn’t be naked are naked…" Whatever, we’re excited. And thanks to HBO, a new clip from tonight’s episode has been released, centering around a house party thrown by Hannah (Dunham) and her new roommate/college ex-boyfriend Elijah (Andrew Rannells). Shoshanna (Zosia Mamet) makes her enterance at the end, like totally ready for the affair—tiny hat and all. Check out the clip below, as well as Dunham’s response to Howard Stern’s sexist remarks and also a fun look at what it would be like if the world of Girls was shroud in horror.

Repulsive Howard Stern Bitches About “Little Fat Girls” Like Lena Dunham

Howard Stern is really giving Rush Limbaugh a run for his money in the Repulsive Sexist Douchebag Department.

On Monday, Stern complained about Girls — a national pasttime, to be sure — and his chief complaint is that Lena Dunham isn’t pretty to look at onscreen. She’s faaaaaaaaaaaat.

"It’s a little fat girl who kinda looks like Jonah Hill and she keeps taking her clothes off and it kind of feels like rape. She seems — it’s like — I don’t want to see that. I learned that this little fat chick writes the show and directs the show and that makes sense to me because she’s such a camera hog that the other characters barely are on. My opinion, if I was a producer on that, I’d say, ‘Honey, you’re a little too close to the project. You need to allow the other characters to breath a little and let us get invested in them.’ Good for her. It’s hard for little fat chicks to get anything going.

A producer interjected, "She thinks she’s brave," to which Stern replied, "Brave? I’m brave! I’m lookin’ at her!"

Translation: your blubber is offending Howard Stern’s eyeballs, Lena Dunham, so give Brian Williams’ hot daughter more camera time. It’s really a lot like a violent sexual assault, when you think about it. 

Dunham handled the douchebaggery with grace and aplomb and an affirmation of Stern’s First Amendment right to be a scumbag. 

She told David Letterman on Thursday night, "I did find out that Howard Stern really hates [Girls], which I’m a Howard Stern fan, and I believe he’s earned the right to free speech and he should go for it. … "I wanna get it on my gravestone where he said, ‘Congrats to her (Dunham). It’s so hard for little fat chicks to get anything going these days."

You can watch a clip of Dunham and Letterman joking about it below. 

I’m not even a Girls fan, but fat-shaming sexist asshattery just makes me want to support Lena Dunham just to fuck Howard Stern.

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How to Get on Forbes’ List of the Highest-Paid Men in Entertainment

Forbes released their list of the highest-paid men in entertainment, and in a shocking turn of events, Frank Stallone has assumed the top spot. We’re just kidding, of course, but the list only goes to ten and we assume he is number eleven. The rankings use estimated earnings between May 2010 and May 2011, and some of the entrants will surprise you.

Forbes lists can be infuriating reads in times of economic strife, but instead of enviously glaring at it, try to learn from the list. In the spirit of the getAbstract business books summarized in the SkyMall catalog, we present short tips on what you can glean from these mega-wealthy men of entertainment, and how to emulate them. See you on next year’s list!

Tiger Woods – $75 million ● Become the best golfer in the world. ● Sign various sponsorship deals worth hundreds of millions of dollars. ● Cheat on your wife and have lots of ambien-induced sex with porn stars. ● Become relatively bad at golf. ● Lose many of your sponsorships, but retain enough to stay on the Forbes list.

Howard Stern – $76 million ● Convince millions of people to listen to you every morning. ● Convince millions of people to pay to continue to listen to you every morning.

Leonardo DiCaprio – $77 million ● Learn how to speak with a Boston accent. ● Practice using it in The Departed. ● Use it again in Shutter Island. ● Don’t use it in Inception. ● Receive adulation and praise for your versatility.

Dr. Phil – $80 million ● Become friends with Oprah. ● That’s pretty much it.

James Patterson – $84 million ● Think of a story idea that a shut-in would describe as “thrilling.” ● Find a co-author or co-authors to help think of exciting adverbs. ● Remember to end chapters with your main character about to open a door.

Simon Cowell – $90 million ● Leave a lucrative singing contest on Fox. ● Start a new singing contest on Fox.

Elton John – $100 million ● Learn the piano. ● Get knighted. ● Buy an English-Swahili dictionary. ● Highlight “hakuna matata.” ● Have no worries.

Steven Spielberg – $107 million ● Produce Harry and the Hendersons. ● Just keep on milking that cash cow.

Jerry Bruckheimer – $113 million ● Open a map. ● Find different locations for CSI shows. ● Hire Justin Bieber to play a terrorist.

Tyler Perry – $130 million ● Dress in drag. ● Make vague allusions to the Bible. ● Become friends with Oprah.

Morning Links: Crystal Harris Says Sex With Hef Sucked, Amy Winehouse Album Sales Soar

● Crystal Harris told Howard Stern that sex with Hef lasted “like two seconds” and that she had never really seen him naked. All of which amounts to “not bad” when you are sleeping with an 85-year-old. [People] ● Nicki Minaj was fined $1,000 for doing what Nick Minaj does best: shaking her superior booty. [RapRadar] ● Everything went according to plan at Amy Winehouse’s funeral yesterday: Kelly Osbourne sported a tribute beehive, Amy’s bodygaurds got one last bizarre picture, and Carole King was played. May she rest in peace. [HuffPost/AP]

● Amy Winehouse has reentered the charts, posthumously selling more albums this past week than she did in the week following her 2008 Grammy sweep. [THR] ● Paris and Lindsay are back together and life is back in harmony. [TMZ] ● Alexander McQueen left £50,000 (or about $82,000) for the care of Minter, Juice, and Callum — his pet dogs. [Guardian] ● Before there was Snooki and Jwoww, there were these girls. [VillageVoice]

Lady Gaga Gave the Performance of Her Career on ‘Howard Stern’ This Morning

Lady Gaga visited The Howard Stern Show this morning and gave what could easily be the most rousing performance of her career. Granted, Gaga’s given thousands of performances that we’ve missed, but were any of them as powerful as this rendition of “Edge of Glory”? With just a piano and a mic, Gaga belted out the song she told Stern was “about knowing in your heart you may never reach that glorious moment until you die, so live life on the edge, halfway between heaven and hell, and let’s all dance in the middle in purgatory.”

Afterward, Stern—who’s been skeptical of Gaga in the past—was simply stunned. “I’m in love with you,” he said. “I want to marry you.” Also, she did this at 8 in the morning. Please, listen.

Afternoon Links: Gwyneth Paltrow Sings at Oscars, Tiger Woods’ New Bachelor Pad

● The Academy announced the musical performers at this year’s ceremony. Among them are: Florence and the Machine, Mandy Moore, A. R. Rahman, and Gwyneth Paltrow, who’ll do just about anything to get back on that stage. [The Academy/Twitter] ● Here is a picture of someone who appears to be Andrew Garfield, in what appears to be a Spider-Man costume, getting what appears to be a blow job. [Pop Sugar] ● Zac Efron “left a party” with Australian actress actress/beauty Teresa Palmer, which is gossip-speak for “went home and traded Nazi playing cards.” [MovieLine]

● Bruno Mars told a Las Vegas judge that he will plead guilty to cocaine possession, meaning if he avoids trouble for one year, the charge will be dismissed and he’ll go back to not being a badass [HuffPo] ● Tiger Woods’ 4 1/2 years in-the-making home is almost ready. The unexpected bachelor pad has a 100 ft.-long swimming pool, tennis and basketball courts, a massive fitness center, and of course, 7,981 fuck rooms. [People] ● And finally, in case you missed it, here’s Howard Stern’s heroic appearance on David Letterman last night, in which, among other things, he refers to Jay Leno as a “horrible person.” [YouTube]

Piers Morgan’s First Week Will Be Much Better than His Second

British journalist and America’s Got Talent judge Piers Morgan scored a huge coup when CNN announced that Oprah Winfrey would be the first guest on his new talk show, Piers Morgan Tonight. And it only got better from there. Today it was revealed that Morgan will follow up Winfrey with Howard Stern (who rarely gives interviews), Condoleezza Rice, Ricky Gervais, and George Clooney – a perfect mix of humor, smarts, relevance, and physical perfection. But then, Week Two takes an unexpected turn for the worse.

Morgan will follow a former Secretary of State and a Hollywood superstar with the guy who got a blow job next to the guy from Creed. That’s right. After Rudy Giuliani and Mitt Romney kick off the show’s second week, Kid Rock will bring his particular brand of wisdom to Morgan’s table, where he’ll be followed by Kim and Kourtney, of the Kardashian family, and then by Donald and Melania Trump. Fingers crossed that Rock will tell us about the time he punched out DJ Jay Campos at a strip club. It’s a classic.