The Most Inoffensive Fro-Yo Opens In Union Square Today

The famously offensive-to-no-one frozen yogurt company Off the Wall opens its third location in Union Square today, marking the true commencement of spring and nightly fro-yo consumption. Low-calorie, self-serve, and Kosher-certified, Off the Wall’s new spot offers 16 flavors on tap, including their hit signatures, such as blueberry muffin, sea salt caramel, and peanut butter blast. Though the prices may be off-the-wall (most commonly due to the inevitable piling of brownie bites from the topping station), the taste is too in the best way, so deal. 

And while this is all well and good, the big news is actually the FREE frozen yogurt giveaway happening on Wednesday, April 3rd, from 6:30pm 8:30pm, during the shop’s grand opening. This giveaway is equal opportunity, meaning every person who stops by Off the Wall will – regardless of sex, race, gender, haircut – receive FREE fro-yo. 

This is U.S. liberty at its finest. Come one, come all. 

Follow Bonnie on Twitter here