The Ghosts of Bowery Past: CBGB, Greenhouse, & W.i.P.

Yesterday I took one of my first days off since ’03 and it was grand. Me and mine went to the Bronx Zoo which was a zoo. Apparently, Wednesdays are donation day with no fixed admission fee, which means approximately 1 billion people descend upon the zoo to enjoy the nice day with the pretty animals at no cost. We had a blast, completely captivated by the captivated lions and tigers and bears. ..oh my! Amongst the zillions of people, we somehow found Hotel Chantelle go-go dancer Nicky Delmonico and assured her tonight’s hot “Generation Wild” Rock Party at Chantelle would be cool. The joint fixed its air conditioning.

We got home, washed the day away, and headed to DBGB Kitchen & Bar for dinner with Marky Ramone and his Marion. We were joined by chef Daniel Boulud who bombarded us with funny tales and scrumptious deserts. Marky and I told and retold tales of yore. We talked of Dee Dee, Joey, CBGB, and Max’s Kansas City. I don’t desire to dwell too long in the past, preferring to keep looking forward, but sitting with an old war horse like Marky leads to inevitable digression. Eventually I’ll tell you all about it. 

As he posed for photographs with giddy patrons – suburban people who now live in nearby condos and chic apartments where there once stood burnt-out buildings that punks, bums, dealers, and scum squatted in – we talked about the ghosts of Bowery past. It was inconceivable to us that such folk are now frolicking and enjoying such fine fare where we youthfully played amongst the ruins. Back then, a container topped with aluminum foil filled with chicken vindaloo and eaten with a plastic fork was fine dining.

Marky is still touring, still banging his drums not so slowly, and doing lots of other things I will, as I said, eventually talk about. At DBGB, his gravy… er sauce, is for sale and prominently on display up front. Marky Ramone’s Brooklyn’s Own Marinara Sauce is featured in delicious pasta dishes that we all shared prior to our entrees. We headed to Bantam, side-stepping homeless folks who haven’t quite heard the good news about how fabulous the neighborhood has become.

I saw a petition on Petitionbuzz that was under the banner "ALLOW WIP & GREENHOUSE to reopen.” When I clicked through, I read this:

"As many of you already know W.I.P & Greenhouse are still closed pending a scheduled hearing on Friday. I know that I can speak for many people when I say that this is a big blow to the people employed by the club, the nightlife community, as well as to the party goers themselves. We all loved hanging out and partying at W.I.P and are sad to see that the actions of 2 world renown hip hop artist acting like thugs shut down a place we all love and leave 300 people (including Greenhouse) out of jobs in this depressed economic state.  I Emailed @NYNightlife asking him whether or not he thought this petition would even be worth while / effective. He replied saying that he would contact someone at WIP/Greenhouse and see what they think. 10 minutes later he Emailed me back saying that he was told "it would go a long way", which means that every "signature" counts. The hearing is scheduled for Friday, so until then lets all make it a point to get as many people  to sign this petition as possible and to share it with everyone we know, thank you."

I have been pretty harsh on the players-to-be-named-later over there at W.i.P./Greenhouse, but anytime a club is closed because of the illegal actions of its patrons, I get confused. It’s like closing Kennedy Airport because the TSA caught some joker smuggling some blow or because a couple of schmoes duked it out on a long line. There were a lot of people making a living over there at those joints. I’m hoping that "were" gets changed to “are.”

 

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Crywolf’s New Dubstep Anthem, ‘The Moon Is Falling Down’

If you’re a normal human being then most “dubstep” will sound like little other than a drunk synthesizer getting kicked to death in a back alley. It’s unusual that a producer is able to harness this weird-ass palette to deliver something recognizably musical, even anthemic. But such is the case with Crywolf’s newest.

“The Moon Is Falling Down” nails all the apocalyptic touches and gives them breathing room with some independently spectral verses. It’ll feature on a new EP, Ghosts, that the Denver producer will drop on April 9. But you can download this particular track right now, for nothing.

Follow Miles Klee on Twitter.

Important Question: Would You Have Sex With a Ghost?

Our friends at The Gloss have a regular series called "Wed Bed Dead" (that’s the PG version of "Marry Fuck Kill," for those not in the know, such as all of our moms), which really is the best game to play, right? And this week’s episode brings up a very important question: would you have sex with a ghost? For those of us who are not Ke$ha, this is probably not something we’ve thought much about. (Well, I guess I have.) Jennifer and Ashley pick three of the most eligible ghostly bachelors—Casper, Beetlejuice, and Sam from Ghost—and break down the options for us all. Take a look after the jump.

(Obviously, the correct answer is Wed Sam, Bed Beetlejuice, and Kill Casper. Think of the lifetime of pottery! And also Oda Mae would probably come hang out all the time.)

Follow Tyler Coates on Twitter.

Confirmed: Ke$ha Has Had Sex With A Ghost

This makes a grand total of one thing I know about Ke$ha.

I just don’t understand why reporters are hedging on the facts here, talking about “claimed” this and “alleged” that. How do you even doubt for a second that Ke$ha has had sex with a ghost. She said it herself! That’s called a primary source, people.

What reason could she possibly have to make this up? I suppose you think she’s only disclosing this “erotic paranormal experience” to advertise her new ghost-themed single, “Supernatural.” Or that she lifted the concept from recent Steven Millhauser novella “We Others.” What pish-posh. There is a ghost out there and Ke$ha has had sex with it:

"I had a couple of experiences with the supernatural. I don’t know his name! He was a ghost! I’m very open to it."

Ke$ha added that her new album Warrior was based around a spiritual quest she went on to improve her music.

Okay? Ghost sex. Between Ke$ha and a nameless male ghost. That’s the only thing that doesn’t add up—I’m thinking she definitely knows the ghost’s name, but doesn’t want him hounded by paparazzi. That’s fine Ke$ha; ghost sex should be a private thing. Unless you want to talk about it.

Follow Miles Klee on Twitter.

Archaeologists Uncover (And Disturb The Ghosts Of) A Sunken Medieval Boat

Researchers in Hungary were very excited to announce today the discovery of an “intact medieval shipwreck” in the choppy and clouded Danube River. This short period of elation will of course be followed up with a prolonged haunting at the invisible hands of those souls who perished aboard the vessel in the accident that likely sank it.

"River navigation was dangerous. Downstream cargo ships floated using large rudder-oars, which made maneuvering very hard. Accidents happened very often," [associate of the National Office of Cultural Heritage Attila J.] Tóth said.

[A] a medieval pot was found next to a floor timber, inside the wreck.

"We believe that the entire cargo could be preserved under the pebble-shoal," Tóth said.

Dear god, the entire cargo? Preserved?! UNDER THE PEBBLE-SHOAL? It’s like dear old Attila never saw a horror movie before. Even if that medieval pot doesn’t contain an avenging spirit, whatever’s still underwater almost certainly carries a deadly curse. I don’t even know what we expect to learn from this centuries-old piece of junk, anyway: it clearly wasn’t seaworthy.

Follow Miles Klee on Twitter.