Meet Beyonce, the Teeny Tiny Death-Defying Puppy

Beyonce’s mother roamed the streets during her pregnancy, eventually being captured and nearly euthanized. Beyonce, consequently, narrowly escaped abortion. When she finally was born, Beyonce had no heartbeat and wasn’t breathing. She weighed only four ounces. Oh, right: Beyonce is a puppy.

The above video does a good job summarizing Beyonce’s struggle since being born a few weeks ago, but you know what does it better? Destiny’s Child lyrics! From "Survivor," the song that inspired Beyonce’s owner to name her after the superstar:

"You thought I couldn’t breathe without you, I’m inhalin’

You thought I couldn’t see without you, Perfect vision

You thought I couldn’t last without you, But I’m lastin’

You thought that I would die without you, But I’m livin’"

National Puppy Day is fleeting (aka was yesterday), but Beyonce is forever.

China Finally Overindulging Pets

Rare, often dangerously inbred puppies, dogs with blue-tinged coats, and K9s with cartoonish haircuts used to be the near exclusive provenance of Japan. Now China, with its massive growth economy and rapidly modernizing culture, is proving that it can embarrassingly overindulge its dogs just as well as any country. Case in point: a current Chinese trend that involves dyeing fido to look like a wild animal.

With the right treatment, a dog can be more than just a multi-colored freak. It can look like a super cute panda or a vicious tiger. Grrr! From 1999 to 2008, figures show that the money spent on pets in China increased by 500 percent. Take comfort. If China is going to take over the world, at least it’ll do so with an adorable pack of chow puppies that look like an endangered species.