According to The Argus, a resident of Brighton, England, has discovered “a vortex to another dimension, complete with a giant snake.” This could be something to worry about.
The strange anomaly was reported using a website called Fix My Street, “which is more typically used to report potholes” and the like. This time, however, a far more serious hole had appeared, just above Montreal Road: a wormhole. The citizen expressed concerns about such a vortex and questioned whether it was part of the Brighton Festival, an annual art event. The next day, they noted the wormhole had gotten worse, “emitting an unsettling yellow light” as a large snake from some other universe poked its head through into ours.
Oh sure, this probably sounds like a big practical joke to you, but this is the kind of warning we ignore at our peril. And the city council has said they will not be following up the claim! This is how horror movies start – with skepticism. Even more pressing is the question of who found the vortex, because Brighton is full of celebrities and it’s definitely one of them, right? Could be the work of Sir Paul McCartney or Steve Coogan. But this type of quiet heroism is a little bit more Cate Blanchett’s style.
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MONDAY: Take it 1040 Easy With Discount Boozing
Celebrate your annual bloodletting for Uncle Sam with a drink rollback from Esquared Hospitality. Check out the desperate procrastinator fest at the Farley Post Office before heading over to Eventi’s nearby Big Screen Plaza. Drinks from Brighton and Humphrey are half-off, and the original Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory screens at 8pm. Sibling joints like BLT Steak, BLT Prime, and BLT Fish will also be serving up beer, wine, and cocktails with a fatty 50-percent rebate.
Enjoy half-off drinks from Esquared Hospitality at Brighton and Humphrey (851 Sixth Ave., Garment District) all day today, April 15th. To learn more about the restaurants, check out their listings above at BlackBook Guides.
THURSDAY: Rib-Sandwich Joint Opens Near Chelsea Market
Dan Delaney of BrisketTown drops a rib-focused stand along the High Line’s Chelsea Market Passage. Smokeline’s sandwiches take inspiration from Central Texas, and pies and bespoke sodas make Chelsea chilling all the sweeter.
Smokeline (Chelsea Market Passage on the High Line, Chelsea) opens Thursday, April 18th. To learn more about the stand, check out the listing at BlackBook Guides.
THURSDAY: First-Class Flights
Sycamore in Ditmas Park continues its Flight Night series with a visit from Frisco’s own Speakeasy Ales & Lagers. Flights of four brews will only set you back $8.
Speakeasy Flight Night at Sycamore (1118 Cortelyou Rd., Ditmas Park) is Thursday, April 18th. To learn more about the bar, check out the listing at BlackBook Guides.
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There are few pleasures in life more enjoyable than outdoor drinking. Summer has officially begun, and in the hot, humid evenings the best place to be is an outdoor patio, cold libation in hand. NYC bars have caught on; an outdoor space is almost a necessity these days. It’s also the perfect setting for bringing that significant other. New York newcomers Brighton, Birreria Roma, and HAVEN (pictured) will ensure your hot date catches a cool breeze.
Brighton is the Eventi
’s sprawling new beach-shack food court. Go Burger brings the beef, and Fish Shack covers your Cape Cod nostalgia, with clam strips, lobster rolls, and beer-battered cod. There’s a tiki bar and a huge outdoor courtyard. Hester Nights on Thursdays bring even more food options, along with something entertaining on the 35-foot (!) TV.
Birreria Roma applies the speakeasy trend to pizzerias. A secret beer garden attached to Pizza Roma
operates as a reservation-only yard. The artisanal house ‘za from Rome is on the menu, with a light dough that’s been rising for four days. Italian versions of doppelbocks and orange blossom-honey ales will expand your suds horizons. It’s a major date-night score, just make sure you call first.
HAVEN at the Sanctuary Hotel
has a private elevator that will take you to 360-degree views above Times Square. There are eye-to-eye vantages of the French Gothic steeple of St. Mary the Virgin, and swaths of green courtesy of both real grass and artificial turf. Small plates keep you fortified as the city lights come alive.