Why I Couldn’t Wake Up This Morning

I didn’t wake up early. I didn’t do anything I was supposed to do this morning. I let the alarm ring on and on until I smashed it. I didn’t bother with that snooze button. I think all publicists should have a schmooze button that I could push hard and they would shut the F*#& up. I didn’t go there, did I? I had Cheetos and Diet Sunkist for breakfast and didn’t feel like a champion. I didn’t win at Bingo last night. I didn’t cash that check I’ve been sitting on, damn. But at least I didn’t suck DJing at TOY last night, even though I think they thought I would. One lovely woman came up to the booth and told me "You’re killing it, they love you!" At my age I want beautiful women to lie to me. Well anyway, I played my rock and roll and it was a great party. There were beautiful people everywhere and everyone was dressed up and drinking and dancing. I’m going to come back and they don’t even have to pay me as long as they get beautiful tall things with perfectlocks and smiles to lie to me again. I didn’t want to leave but I didn’t want to disappoint elsewhere.

I didn’t go to Adam Ant’s concert this weekend. I had at least three good questions for him, but alas, they wouldn’t let me interview him, so I didn’t. I’ve interviewed some big stars and a guy on a comeback might have cooperated… but he didn’t. Geez, I interviewed Jamie Foxx last week and he’s almost as big a star as Mr. Ant, isn’t he? I didn’t go there…did I? They wouldn’t let my photog. Lela Edgar have access and I didn’t feel it. As far as I was concerned, Adam Ant is a photo op, period. I remember back in the day when he was the high-cheekboned wonder boy with smash hits and pirate costumes. He played some pier and came up the river in a pirate ship. What an entrance. But then he exited the good life, the music, the scene, and now he’s an aging pop star popping back up. Maybe I should have believed the hype or gone for nostalgic reasons, but I just didn’t. I don’t play any of his smash hits in my set. Maybe I should. I’m going to buy them on iTunes right after I return from the store with a new alarm clock. With that, I can tell what time it is while I consider what decade or era this is. I read the reviews of other Adam Ant shows in England and Florida and such and they were mixed, mostly discussing what he looked like and how he acted. I went to a dive bar, watched a game, and wondered who was on the Yankees when Adam last played. I could have looked it up on my very smartphone…but I didn’t.

I didn’t want to write today but they have given me this new button so I’m easy to find again and I didn’t want to disappoint. If I ever do, it’s perfectly OK for you to lie to me. I didn’t want to say no to a pitch to write about this charity event from Wall Street Rocks. It’s the 9th Annual Hedge Fund Roctoberfest this Thursday, October 11th from 7pm to 11pm at 583 Park Ave. It benefits ALTSO, A Leg To Stand On. That’s a children’s charity that supports children with limb disabilities. Special guest musician and Wall Street Rocks Ambassador David Hudson, who is Katy Perry’s brother, will perform live on stage at the benefit concert. These same Wall Street Rock folks are hosting a Wall Street Rocks Battle of The Bands Round 3 on Tuesday, October 30th at venerable Mercury Lounge, 6pm. Proceeds from this bash will benefit the Wounded Warrior Project and ReserveAid. The release states: "Wall Street Rocks is a non-profit organization comprised of members of the finance, technology, and entertainment communities that have banded together to honor and assist our nation’s war heroes."