Openings: Monticello Motor Club, New York

Everything’s gone green — and god, is it ever boring. And let’s face it: Deep down, we know we’re all doomed, anyway. The ideal backlash maneuver, of course, is getting yourself behind the wheel of a glamorous Italian machine and torquing your way to high-speed nirvana. For those who are already in possession of their own little piece of automotive history, the new Monticello Motor Club offers up a sort of spa/playland package: At their facility, just 90 minutes outside of New York City, they will garage and pamper your designer chariot while you’re off dealing with all that banal life stuff; when it’s playtime, they’ve got 4.1 miles of glorious, custom-designed track for you to burn up, and a staff of professional drivers on hand to make sure you don’t actually hurt yourself.

Of course, this sort of thing being the province of the rich and famous, there’s also a clubhouse kitted out with spa, fitness center and haute dining establishment. Conversely, the Van Horssen Group is for those for whom full ownership of a posh vehicle is not quite practical or attainable. Membership allows one to share Aston Martins, Maseratis, even a Rolls-Royce Phantom, with fellow car fiends, and once signed up, you can choose to take each out for a day, month, whatever. “My Other Car Is A …” bumper stickers not included.

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