In a nutshell: have sex twice this weekend and don’t do coke. Unless you’ve never snorted the White Lady in your life– then do her once. Unless you’re an adolescent– then don’t do either drugs or sex. This advices comes from scientists! So it can be trusted! Not so unexpectedly, men who are having sex at least twice a week are 45 percent less likely to develop heart disease than men who aren’t. More unexpectedly, a study published in Science about how cocaine alters the way the genes in your brain work found that using Bolivian Marching Powder once might be good for you.
Basically, beside from making you feel awake, talkative and otherwise naughty, cocaine affects an important protein in the brain that can help with learning. Regular cocaine use suppresses that protein, but according to Time‘s parsing of the Science piece, “Onetime use of cocaine increases levels [of the protein in question].” In other words, coke is still bad for you, but maybe not if you’ve never tried it before.
Sex, though, is pretty much definitively good for you, especially if you’re a man. Since 1987 researchers have been tracking the sexual activity of men in Massachusetts and found that “Men with the desire for frequent sexual activity and who are able to engage in it are likely to be healthier” and “showed men who made love at least twice a week were much less likely to have heart disease than those whose sexual encounters were limited to once a month or less.” Also, sex helps with cancer (ejaculating five times a week wards off prostate cancer) and boosts your immune system. The findings are the first of its kind, as many separate research projects have outlined the benefits of sex on emotional health and stress, but there have been fewer studies about the effect of frequent intercourse on major illnesses such as heart disease.