Kate Middleton vs. Kim Kardashian: Who Has the Gaudiest Ring?

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Kim Kardashian’s engagement ring, given to her by fiancé Kris Humphries, is worth $2 million. That seems like a lot to spend on something that one might easily leave on a public bathroom sink or that might become a rather contentious issue in the event of, I don’t know, divorce. Anyway, it’s a big old gaudy ring: “a 16.5-carat emerald cut diamond in the center of two 2-carat trapezoid shaped stones, totaling 20.5 carats of ‘the highest clarity and color.” (I can’t seem to find any good pictures of it, but it’s on the cover of People this week). How does it stack up against another recently-famous ring, Kate Middleton’s 18-carat sapphire?

Carats: Kim’s ring wins in this category, in terms of sheer excess. 20.5 carats! I don’t know much about jewelry, but that seems like a lot of carats to me. Kate’s is close, at 18 carats, but no cigar.

Stones: Kate’s ring features a gorgeous sapphire surrounded by little diamonds. Kim’s consists of diamond upon diamond upon diamond. While it’s true that the stone on Kate’s ring is very large, it’s still a sapphire and thus relatively understated (and did you know that sapphires are actually more rare than diamonds?). The gaudy award goes to Kim in this category.

Backstory: Kate’s ring, as we all know, belonged to William’s mother Diana. Wills said of his mother and the choice to use her ring, “Obviously, she’s not going to be around to share in any of the fun and excitement of it all, so this is my way of keeping her sort of close to it all.” Awww. William took the ring from a royal safe and carried it around with him for three weeks in Africa before proposing to Kate with it in Kenya. Oh, and it’s made of Welsh gold, which is traditional for royal brides. Kim, on the other hand, walked into her bedroom to find Kris Humphries kneeling on her floor with “WILL YOU MARRY ME?” spelled out in rose petals, holding a massive diamond ring worth half the value of the house this all took place in.

Winner: Kim Kardashian

And lo, Kim Kardashian wins the only competition she will ever enter (albeit unwittingly) against Kate Middleton. You stay classy, Kim and Kris!