There Is No Band Called the Chelsea Clintons

Man, I sure miss the days when music festivals were about the music, man! Back before they were just an excuse for overprivileged, overgrown manchildren to frolic in mud, have anonymous tent sex, take lots of hallucinogens and wear clothing items appropriating indigenous American cultures. Remember Woodstock? We need to go back to that aesthetic. That was totally, completely, 100% about the music. Maybe not, but there’s still something gratifying about watching wannabe-cool kids fall on their faces, hence, this video.

Making fun of teenagers because they haven’t heard of ["Important" Cultural Entity] is tired and lazy and dumb and how many Twitter-screencap compilations do we really need of that come on get a new shtick, but making fun of them for pretending to know things they clearly have no idea about in an effort to seem in-the-know is actually still pretty funny, turns out. Jimmy Kimmel, he of convincing parents to prank their children and say they ate all their Halloween candy, brought a team out to Coachella to interview particularly obnoxious-seeming festivalgoers about their excitement over fake bands. The interviewees gushed over The Chelsea Clintons, Dr. Schlomo and the G.I. Clinic and Get The Fuck Out of My Pool. But the best, and most essential, is obviously a takedown of some skinny white dude in a Native American war bonnet. "Coachella," as it turns out, "is Native American for ‘Dumb White Guy.’" Makes sense. Watch.

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