Tonight: Maxim’s ‘World’s Most Beautiful Women’ Party, Domi Dollz’ ‘Shades of Kink’

If Maxim has decided to throw a party for the WORLD’S MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMEN. who am I to argue. They have named the HOT 100 and made a list and I checked it (twice). Some actual top 100s are going to be at this event being held tonight at The Gallery at Dream Downtown hotel, 355 West 16th Street. The music will be brought to you by DJ Vice, underlying that this is a big event – a hot event. Among the attendees is the number one hottest girl in the world from their list (my list has Amanda at the very top): Bar Refaeli. Others who you can strike out with include: Abby Elliot (Saturday Night Live), April Rose (model), Bria Murphy (model), Claire Coffee (General Hospital), Jessica Rafalowski (model), Jenny “JWOWW” Farley (MTV’s The Jersey Shore), Katrina Bowden (30 Rock), Nadia G (TV personality), Rebecca Mader (actress), and many more. This list thing is 12 years young and for the first time ever, the Maxim readers made the selection. What to wear?

Some prophet once said beauty is "in the eye of the beholder" and another said "beauty is only skin deep.” This beholder’s eyes think beauty must have skin covered with tattoos. For me, it don’t mean thing if it don’t have that sting. So I’m sure to find hottie heaven at the 6th Annual NYC Zombie Crawl in my native Williamsburg, Brooklyn this Sunday. It’s presented by the new Resident Evil video game and the BBURG requisite Sailor Jerry Rum and Pabst Blue Ribbon. People will be running around in Halloween in May gear with the grand finale at Public Assembly, 70 North 6th Street, where the girls of burningangel.com will offer up Strip for Pain "America’s Most Dangerous Game Show.” For me, this trumps Maxim’s hot list, but I can appreciate both sides of the coin… even it’s an edge.

Public Assembly will hold live performances by Bikini Carwash (9pm) and Fucking Bullshit (9:45pm). There will be a Rigor Mortis Burlesque Revue, prizes for the best costumes…well, you get the idea. The Zombie Crawl begins at 3:30pm at The Trash Bar, 256 Grand Street, where makeup technicians will, for a small fee ($5), make you look undead. At 3:30 pm on a Sunday in Williamsburg, everyone looks a little undead anyway. Then it’s on to The Grand Victory, 245 Grand Street, where additional Zombie action will be rampant. By 6pm it’s a march down Bedford Avenue, where all will pop into Spike Hill, 186 Bedford, for "flesh hook" performances by Nassau Chainsaw DisGraCeLand Demolition Committee. All will gather after in McCarren Park for photo-ops and a chance to confuse the tourists and nouveau hipsters who discovered Williamsburg by watching HBO’s epic series Girls.

If the Sailor Jerry Rum and PBR’s haven’t gotten the best of me and mine, we’ll head to Bowery Poetry Club, 306 Bowery at Houston, to take in Linda Simpson’s new party "Exhibit A,” Sunday at 10pm, $5.

Exhibit A promises to take "the spectator on an absurd and erotic journey.” That sounds a lot like my third marriage, so I’m there. This is a last-Sunday-of-every- month affair, which sounds like my second marriage. On stage, there will be experimental drag rules, high-concept hostess Sylvia London, sexual outlaw Alexis Blair Penney, and non-stop butch and femme orgy by Dollhaus and Dj Chris P.

Tonight, (and I have told you about this before; pay attention or a spanking may be in order), Domi Dollz presents “Shades of Kink” at – where else – the Museum of Sex, 233 5th Avenue at 27th Street. This event will show you the ropes and other ways to spice up your love life. It’s a perfect place for a couple looking for answers to all the wrong questions and for singles looking for Mr. or Ms. right or wrong. If you have been looking for love in all the wrong places, then this place is perfect for you. It is way wrong – and right.

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