Your Daily Guide To Trending Topics

Every day there are some topics that are trending. Since many of them don’t make sense, we provide easy contextualization. Also, this way, you won’t actually have to know anything about anything.

Wisconsin Recall

The top two trending terms on Google today have to do with Scott Walker, the first-term Republican governor from Wisconsin. Walker is now the first ever governor in the history of the United States to have won a recall election. See, after Walker was initially elected, he introduced a plan to save money for the state by cutting public employee pensions and eliminating bargaining rights. This was enough for the state’s labor movement to force a recall election. The joke’s on them, sadly, because Walker killed it, defeating his opponent with a 10% margin. Walker’s earned a fan in no less than Mitt Romney, who said, “Governor Walker has shown that citizens and taxpayers can fight back – and prevail – against the runaway government costs imposed by labor bosses. Tonight voters said ‘no’ to the tired, liberal ideas of yesterday, and ‘yes’ to fiscal responsibility and a new direction.” 

Amber Portwood

Before we get too comfortable with all of this political news being searched for on Google—honestly it’s enough to make a guy’s head spin!—here’s Amber Portwood. The star of the MTV train wreck Teen Mom has been sentenced to at least two years (but perhaps up to five) in prison on drug charges. Originally the reality TV monster avoided the clink by going to rehab, but she brilliantly dropped out of that program. Portwood has had a long relationship with the law, including a 2010 arrest on felony domestic violence charges and a more recently May arrest thanks to a probation violation, care of a failed drug test.

Amanda Bynes

Yahoo! users have no obvious political interests this morning, as the misdemeanor DUI charges against once adorable teen actress (now former actress) Amanda Bynes top the search trends. Bynes was arrested in West Hollywood back in April after she slammed her BMW into a cop car and arrested on the suspicion of driving under the influence. Bynes is standing up for herself in a rather unusual way: tweeting at the President. Tuesday night she wrote, “Hey @BarackObama… I don’t drink. Please fire the cop who arrested me. I also don’t hit and run. The end.” 

Miss New Zealand

Avianca Bohn might soon be stripped of her beauty-queen title of Miss New Zealand now that it’s been discovered she’s not an actual citizen. The situation is, of course, of great concern to Yahoo! readers. As it turns out, the 22-year-old beauty moved to the country from South Africa at age 16. Her citizenship, she has said, is pending. “"Everyone’s got contacts, and it’s one of the first things that we’re going to do and sort out," she said in an interview. "It’s just the paperwork. I mean New Zealand is such a multicultural country. It’s not an issue to me at all, I’m not even worried about that." The director of pageant (owned by Donald Trump, an expert in citizenship) has said that Bohn should not have won and was, in fact, only in the competition to build her confidence. “"It’s not embarrassing for the competition. It’s embarrassing for the [chief] judge, who should have taken on board what I said to him," the director said. "It says that in their entry form. [Ms Bohm] and I both had a clear understanding that she couldn’t win.” Except she did.

Vampire Skeletons

Bing is all excited about the discovery in Bulgaria of two skeletons whose chests were pierced with iron rods, making it seem likely that they were staked for being vampires. "These skeletons stabbed with rods illustrate a practice which was common in some Bulgarian villages up until the first decade of the 20th Century,” the head of Bulgaria’s National History Museum has said. To date over 100 skeletons bearing the marks of vampire slayers have been found in the spooky country. But really, news story of True Blood marketing? 

#Worstof2012

The year’s about half over and already Twitter is cataloging what’s been wrong with it. There’s also a huge number of posts congratulating Miley Cyrus and her big-headed beau Liam Hemsworth on their supposed engagement, but that is a much less popular hashtag than the one that allows you to complain.

Worst 4

Worst 3

Worst 2

Worst 1

 

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