To fall in love with a film is a beautiful feeling. To be profoundly effected by it in a psychological, physical, and emotional way is rare and when you happen upon it, it’s something to be cherished. Usually when I find myself completely enraptured by something I see, I like to walk away from it for a short while. Leave it alone. Let it breathe. Allow my memory of the experience to seep its way into my bloodstream and live there—partly for fear that viewing in rapid succession will hinder my response to the work or somehow lessen its wonder. But with Shane Carruth’s sophomore film, Upstream Color, the rule had to be broken.
It wasn’t a film I wanted to see again and again and again…and again to try and understand its confounding nature entirely or make myself believe I understood every intention Shane had as a filmmaker, composer, actor, writer, etc. No, I needed to see it again because watching it felt so damn good—so stimulating to the senses on every level. I could tell you every plot point, every detail, I could cut my chest open and hand you my heart and say yes, this is how the film makes me feel, this what this insane genius’ amalgamation of atmosphere, sound, light, and feeling did to me—but it would mean nothing. Nothing at all unless you’ve seen the film for yourself. It’s truly an experiential work of someone who operates with a keen sense of universal truth and understanding of the pain of love, the complexities of nature, and the questions of existence that plague us all.
And in anticipation of the film’s release in April, today the soundtrack has premiered (get it digitally or on vinyl) and you’re going to have to listen to this. Composed by Shane himself, the ambient and visceral music for the film is what elevates it entirely into the world of the ineffable and is so integral to its life. So if you’re nowhere near a grassy field at dusk or entwined with someone you love, go sit in the nearest bathtub and blast this high. It’s incredible.