Nobody Asked, But Here’s Your National Mammal: Bison

One reason U.S. Congress currently boasts a lower approval rating than telemarketers: instead of seeking tangible ways to enhance the country’s infrastructure or create the jobs that are apparently so important to all those whiny unemployed folks, they’re quadruple-sponsoring the sorts of bills that decide, essentially, what our favorite animals are.

Yes, bipartisanism is alive and well.

No disrespect to the Wildlife Conservation Society, because the zoological bounty of this fair nation should of course be celebrated and preserved—nature is wicked awesome—but emailing me to suggest I demand my elected representatives support The National Bison Legacy Act is akin to asking me to tell my HR representative she can go bowling for a few hours instead of fixing that payroll issue.

Anyway, here’s the WCS argument for choosing bison over, I dunno, muskrats:

Why bison? They’ve been an important part of our history and culture for centuries (did you know they helped shape the Great Plains?!) and are already a widely recognized symbol for academic institutions, sports teams’ logos, and even coins. Plus, they’re our country’s largest land mammal, with residence in all 50 states.

Immediately I said “bullshit,” Googled “bison in Florida” and ate my hat. Fine, bison it is. As long as nobody filibusters.

[Ed. Note: Tagged under "art"? Sure!]

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